


We're Pop Rocks (And Cola?)

by killugami



Category: BnHA, Boku no Hero Academia, My Hero Academia, mha
Genre: JUST READ IT PLEASE I POURED MY HEART INTO THIS, M/M, Mostly Fluff, bakugo swears a lot lol, bakugo x kirishima - Freeform, bakushima, kinda angsty here and there, kiribaku, make outs are a thing, no dicks come out of the bag sorry, this is more of an exploration of their relationship than mindless fucking just so u know lol, this is my first time posting a fic im so sorry about the tags omg, this is some self indulgence Gays ngl
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-07
Updated: 2018-07-07
Packaged: 2019-06-06 18:35:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 22,950
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15200900
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/killugami/pseuds/killugami
Summary: He grumbled as he's walked down the hall and kicked at the floor. 'Dammit... these people just don't understand...' He unknowingly thought back to Kirishima again. 'But...he said he wanted to....' His eyes softened at the thought. Someone to confide in. Maybe he wouldn't get in the way. Would it really be in the way if he was by his side? Someone to talk to.... Kirishima was on his level, yeah... He could probably surpass him, but... still... that didn't make him any less inferior. He was hardworking and strong, he'd make a suitable partner. Better than everyone else at school anyway.'Well, it probably won't last, but I can give it a shot...maybe... as long as he doesn't tell anyone...'





	1. The Start

**Author's Note:**

> So far this is an ongoing fic, so I hope you enjoy!

Bakugo.  
  
Kirishima couldn't help but notice how hard he worked each and every day... was always screaming from stress, so it was hard to ignore. They were friends, perhaps best friends (thought Bakugo would never admit it) and he knew that he had a little more going on behind the scenes than he would like to admit. Something in his head, something... he never explained. But regardless, he was always trying and succeeding without any competition because that was just how great he was. And you couldn't hate him for being the best, because the cute screaming Chihuahua earned it, dammit.  
  
But today he was going to tell him all about it. How he thought about him, how he felt... He had said "Can I borrow you for a second?" at lunch and now here they were, behind the school and near the training field where they had all first showed each others Quirks off. This was the place he had blasted that ball Aizawa handed him off into infinity, if he recalled correctly. And now... he took a deep breath.  
  
"I love you."  
  
Bakugo's face went from subtle annoyance to pure shock quicker than Gran Torino.  
  
"I...I'm sorry,  _what?"_  
  
"I said I love you." Kirishima stepped closer and clenched his fists. "I want nothing more than to be with you. You're an amazing person who I think about every day, who I want to KNOW more about everyday. You're absolutely fantastic and you make my heart race everytime you speak. I.... I just wanted you to know, but..." He stared away. "I understand if you don't want to try something. I just wanted to finally man up and say it."  
  
Bakugo was silent. He didn't even know what to say. The situation is...VERY unprecedented. He'd always screamed and fought and everything because he didn't want anyone in his way, nothing keeping him down from being the best. He didn't want anyone patronizing him and cooing at him and telling him he's oh-so-great when he wasn't good enough yet. He didn't like to idea, frankly.   
So he just sighed and calmly said,"Kirishima... I'm not entirely sure to respond to this, but it's a no." He felt a twinge of guilt seeing the slight flinch Kirishima displayed but the red haired boy straightened up and nodded. "I understand. Thank you for your time though. Still bros?" He raised his fist for a fist bump. Bakugo rolled his eyes and bumped his fist with his own. "Still bros."  
  
A little while later, in class...  
  
Kirishima was in turmoil. He was totally saddened and heartbroken and internally  _UWAAAGH I MADE IT TOTALLY AWKWARD AND WEIRD BETWEEN US... I don't think he's talking to me as much... is he avoiding me?... SHIT, THAT'S WHAT I GET, ISN'T IT..._  But he fought it down the best he can and tells himself to man up and what not.  
  
Bakugo is ALSO in turmoil, and is rather confused.  _He said I was amazing...that I made his heart rush..._  His own heart was thumping just thinking about it.  _Wow....and he thinks about me? Everyday? I mean, everyone should, they should all be bowing down to me, but...._  He tapped his pencil against his desk and leaned his head into his hand.  _Kirishima..._  
  
Weeks pass.  
  
Bakugo usually wasn't so quiet and had been avoiding Kirishima a bit, but not entirely. He still LOOKED at him, though it was usually with a puzzled stare before looking away again. Kirishima was in AGONY and wished that his hardened skin would be able to deflect such a look.  
  
Denki and the others even noticed and the electric boy asked,"Yo, is Bakugo okay?" "I don't know man," Kirishima admitted. "I...I said some stuff to him......" "Uh oh. Was it a yo mama joke?" "NO! Get real." "I mean, if someone insulted MY mom I wouldn't talk to them either." "You're no help." "What are you talking about?? I charge phones for days!" "I guess you're right."  
Denki frowned and pat his shoulder. "Come on! Even  _you_ are down in the dumps! What's up?" "Nothing..." "Duuude." "........................." He glanced back and rubbed his arm before grumbling,"Isaidihadacrushonhim." "You what?" "I told him I liked him! ....I-In a bro way, but I think he took it incorrectly!" Denki blinked. "Did...you say no homo?" "No--" _"THAT'S WHERE YOU FUCKED UP!!!"_  Denki wailed and shook his shoulders. "YOU'VE GONE 'N FUCKED UP, KIRISHIMA!!  **YOU FUCKED UP BIGTIME!!"**  
  
Meanwhile, Bakugo was grumbling as he studied at lunch. He was just trying to drown himself in textbooks to get that damn red haired goddess out of his mind.  _Quirks are supposed to be inherited from the parents... I wonder which of Kirishima's parents had the hardening quirk... maybe it was a combination-- NO DAMMIT! YOU'RE THINKING ABOUT HIM AGAIN!!_  He gave one of his demonic roars of frustration and explodorized the book. The librarian gave a curt "shhhh."  
**"FUCK OFF OLD LADY!!!"**  
  
He was promptly kicked out of the library.  
  
 He grumbled as he's walked down the hall and kicked at the floor. _Dammit... these people just don't understand..._ He unknowingly thought back to Kirishima again. _But...he said he wanted to...._  His eyes softened at the thought. Someone to confide in. Maybe he wouldn't get in the way. Would it really be in the way if he was by his side? Someone to talk to.... Kirishima was on his level, yeah... He could probably surpass him, but... still... that didn't make him any less inferior. He was hardworking and strong, he'd make a suitable partner. Better than everyone else at school anyway.  
_Well, it probably won't last, but I can give it a shot...maybe... as long as he doesn't tell anyone..._  [Mind you, it's been about two or three weeks since the confession.]  
  
He sighed and ran his hands through his hair. _Yeah... if he doesn't tell anyone, it doesn't matter..._  His heart was twirling at the thought. Him and Kirishima together.... holding hands? K... Kissing? He wanted to punch himself in the face.  _I can't do that! I... well... will he like a relationship where there's no kissing allowed?_  He heart clenched.  _Why do I care what he likes?! AGH!!_  
  
He barely restrained exploding someone walking by, but wasn't any less irritated to see that it's Iida. "Bakugo," he addressed in a concerned manner and pushes up his eyeglasses. "I've noticed you're peculiar behavior lately." "And?" Bakugo spat. "AND, as class president, I was wondering what was wrong and if there was anything that you needed." "I'm fine." "Are you?" For the first time, he hesitated. He decided to just scoff and started walking ahead. "Bakugo, I know I'm not your friend, but we're all still students here and we need to look out for each other. I know there's people who look out for even you, even though that number is... slim to none!" "I don't need anyone to look out for me!!" Bakugo snarled and royally flicked him off. "Fuck all of you! I don't need your fucking sappy shit!"  
  
_But maybe..._  
Kirishima blinked. They were at the same place again, and he didn't expect this turn of events.  
_I need a little...  
_  
Bakugo was leaned on the wall and staring away. He had gotten them both lunch, and it was their first time talking in weeks. Kirishima was a wreck but hides it behind a crooked smile and waited for his friend to say something behind his drink. "Uh....so...." The fire boy doesn't reply.  _Okay, I'll just shut up now.  
_  
He nearly jumped at the sound of Bakugo's sigh. But no words came after it.  
  
Kirishima was getting annoyed, frankly. First he dragged him out here and bought him lunch after not talking to him for weeks, and now he wasn't even looking in his direction, much less saying a word?  _Is he mocking me? Toying with me or something? Is he waiting for me to make a move?_  He narrowed his eyes and moved from leaning on the wall. _Maybe I will._  
"What the hell, dude?" he hissed, a little more violently than he had anticipated, but... it hurt. It really did hurt.  
Bakugo clenched his drink but still doesn't speak.  
"You said you were cool with it. That you were fine with my confession and what not. So why are you acting like this? Did you change your mind? That you don't want to even be friends anymore? Is it too awkward? If it is, just man up and tell me." "I did change my mind," the blonde finally said and sets his drink down. "It's just--" "Then why didn't you tell me weeks ago? I understand if you were thinking about it for a while, but three weeks? Would YOU want to spend three weeks on a damn tight rope? That's what you did to me. And I didn't appreciate it one bit, Bakugo. If you came out here to tell me to fuck off, then I deserve an apology before hand."  
  
Bakugo glanced in his direction, and was surprised to once again see his determined gaze, not even deterred by this predicament. His eyes were gleaming, perhaps with tears, and his shark like teeth were  grit back in a scowl lined with more inner pain than he was putting to words.   
_I don't want him to feel like this._  Bakugo's expression softened.  _I...I don't want him to feel like this at all._  
  
"Come on! Say it! Apologize!" Kirishima hissed, but there was no hatred was in his voice. If anything, it was despair. He wanted the stinging bandaid to finally be ripped off. And Bakugo knew that.  _He really is convinced I don't want to be his friend, huh?_  He took a deep breath. _Here goes._  
  
"Kirishima....I'm sorry."   
  
The red haired boy stared away, unable to face the oncoming rejection.  
  
"I'm sorry for putting you on that...tight rope or whatever you said for so long, but... after a long, LONG and heavy consideration, I...I thought... maybe... perhaps...." Kirishima started to put the pieces together. He slowly turned back, his face stricken with disbelief. "Perhaps what?" he asked quietly, and one could see the life flooding back into him just from the realization. Bakugo winced and scratched his head to distract such a beautiful face and from his leaping heart. "Perhaps....I...we could... try something out....maybe," he finished, barely audible.  
  
But even if it was barely audible, it was all Kirishima needed to hear. "HOLY SHI--" "SHUT UP!" Bakugo immediately clapped his hand over his mouth and grit his teeth. "I-I'm just saying! I'm setting ground rules, okay?!" The boy was beaming and nodded vigorously.  _God, those sparkling eyes... is he still going to cry? Fuck, I hope not._ Bakugo sighed and laid it down. "No...gay shit." Kirishima raised an eyebrow. "No, like... kissing or hand holding or anything. Especially not in public. Or like... ever. Also no. Telling. ANYONE. This will start and silence, and it will end in silence. W-well, IF it ends..." He hated that he could feel Kirishima's grin grow wider beneath his hand. "DON'T GET YOUR HOPES UP! After being with you for whatever, um, maybe I'll just give up or some shit. I don't know how fuckin' relationships work, I just.... we'll try it out, okay?!" He nodded and Bakugo felt his chest swell with soft cotton and sweetness upon seeing Kirishima's beaming face.  
  
Though he felt guilt when he sniffed. "M-Man, I-I-I thought you f-fuckin hated me or something," he choked and rubbed his face with his arm. "Fuck, dude, you really scared me...!" "Yeah, well," Bakugo grumbled with embarrassment and looked away. He hissed when he got punched in the shoulder. "FUCK! Why?!" "That's only one percent of the pain I felt within the last month!"  
  
Bakugo practically froze when Kirishima suddenly caught him in a tight embrace. "And that... is one percent of what I feel for you," he whispered quietly and buried his face into his shoulder in complete bliss. The blonde blinked, not... not sure what to do about this tingly feeling climbing around him and the warmth building in his face. The complete comfort and safety he felt in these arms, he.... He usually didn't hug anyone EVER, but... he did his best to hug back, if only briefly. "...Yeah," he mumbled, his mind still stunned and trying to process what was going on between them. They weren't moving, but there was friction, a friction he couldn't explain.  
  
_Maybe this...this won't be so bad after all._


	2. The Talk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heh, from the last chapter, this may seem to be a bit of a jump, but I promise I'll write about the in betweens in further chapters.

Bakugo and Kirishima were on a date of sorts, if a date was going to your favorite spot behind school and doing whatever. It was in the training field where they did their races and sports and such... and at the moment, they were behind the bleachers and sitting in the shade of them. This was their spot. Their comfort zone.  
  
But something was off, and Bakugo knew it. They had been going a couple months strong in secret now, and... it had been great! Sorta. Yeah, they hardly touched, and when Kirishima first kissed him, he nearly lost a portion of his face and they never kissed on the mouth after that... it was comforting to just HAVE someone. Someone there. But it was also painful, because now on top of everything else, he had to add someone else to the list of things he had to worry about. So he just didn't worry; Kirishima can survive on his own. He never needed him before now, so he doesn't need him now... He was already perfect to Kirishima, so there was nothing he could do that would make him think otherwise. Why SHOULD he think otherwise, anyway? He was truly doing his best at everything. They had never hugged, kissed, or held hands before now, so it was fine. It was all fine.  
  
But still. Seeing Kirishima staring at his food so dejectedly and not even casting him that excited smile, that proud smile. Everyday he texted good morning, every night he texted goodnight. His hands always reached for Bakugo's when they were alone together, before realizing he shouldn't, then being granted permission that lit his whole day up. He leaned on him when he was tired and helped him get his shirt on after gym class when he was exhausted, and even brought him his favorite snacks from the vending machine when he was hungry.  
  
He was more than he could ever ask for.  
  
And now, something was wrong.  
  
"...Kirishima?" he asked, but his voice shook slightly with hesitation. _Should I say something? Is there anything to say?_  
"Mn?" The red hair boy glanced up. That was the most curt and terse response he had ever gotten from the energetic and enthusiastic guy. Bakugo was genuinely concerned, now. "Kirishima, what's wrong?" he demanded, eyes narrowed. He didn't mean to sound angry, but it was a default for him.  
  
"Well..." Kirishima drew in the dirt with his finger. The picture was vaguely shaped like a heart, making Bakugo blush. But...there was something  _very_ concerning about the way he through a line through it. What was even more pressing was when the boy looked at him. His eyes were too resolved for comfort. The shadow of the benches did no favors.  
  
"...What is it? Kirishima, you better start fucking talking," Bakugo growled, an icy fear creeping up his spine. "Bakugo..." Kirishima sighed, pity and pain weaved into his voice. "I just...don't know anymore." "Don't know what?!" He  _hated_ raising his voice at him, he really did, but he didn't like the places his mind was wondering. But the boy didn't flinch. He only sighed again, that resigned sigh.   
"I... I don't know if we can do this anymore. Or rather, if _I_  can do this anymore."  
  
Everything stopped. Bakugo's heart stopped, but rage was in his face.  _"What? What do you mean??_ " he whispered, voice scathing. "You mean us dating?" "If you can even call it that," Kirishima drawled and pulled his knees up to his chest. "I... I don't know. I've tried... very very hard for you. But...what have you done for me?"   
The red haired kid finally looked him dead in the eye with something other than hopelessness. He stared with an ache that had been there only after they started dating, and it had come to the forefront now. "What? Is... is not being with you good enough?!" Bakugo cried, getting to his feet and throwing his hands up. "What else could you possibly want from me!?" "Is that what you think a relationship is??" Kirishima asked, appalled. "Isn't that what you wanted?" he shot back. "Yes, but..." "Then why?! Why this?!"   
  
"Bakugo." His voice was flat and cold. "I've done nothing but give. You've done nothing but take. You didn't even acknowledge how much I was giving. Tell me. What have you done for me? Because if you're just dating me because you felt like it..." His hands clenched onto his pants. "I feel pitied and used, Bakugo. At the beginning you even said it wouldn't last. I feel like you just want me to rub your ego or something. I know you the same as I did before we started 'dating.'"   
  
Bakugo's heart dropped and shattered.  _He... he wants to break up with me._  Pools of liquid ice replaced what was once warm.   
_He... wants to leave me. Why? Why? He says I haven't given him anything... think, think, THINK! I know I have!_ The ice was blocking his throat.  _ **Just think of something!!**_  
  
First date. They went out to a coffee shop and talked for a bit. He remembered Kirishima's angelic laugh when he drank the coffee too soon and practically burned his tongue off.  _I had paid for that, right?_  But what else had he invested in that date? Kirishima had smiled at him endearingly, and he had only looked back awkwardly...  
  
Class. Bakugo was grumbling as he took notes in class, and Kirishima had tapped him on the shoulder. He looked behind him, and the damned idiot was smirking and mouthed, "You're so cute." It took all his might not to smack him upside the head with a textbook, and he had replied with a discomforted hiss and a text message after class saying, "Don't EVER FUCKING DO THAT AGAIN." It...yeah, that probably wasn't the best example...  
  
Walking! Right, they were walking...they were leaving school and they were walking out the gates to go their separate ways. Bakugo was going his way before hearing Kirishima call, "BAKUGO!" He had groaned and turned around, wondering what it could  _possibly_ be-- He was greeted with a box of crackers, but rockboy was still smiling like an idiot. Bakugo had raised an eyebrow but otherwise rolled his eyes and headed home. At home, he dumped out the box to find a bunch of little encouraging love notes and beef jerky "to keep you up and running! <3" He was so moved when he received them, almost to tears... but the next day... he had only given a gruff and embarrassed "thank you for that" to him. And that amounted to...  
  
_Nothing. I've given him nothing.  
  
Nothing at all._  
  
Bakugo stared emptily at Kirishima as he stood. "I mean, I seem to only be humiliating you anyway," he mumbled and rubbed his neck. His back was to him. "I'm sorry for ever putting you in this situation. I guess I got a little too excited or head over heels, and I should have known you weren't this type of guy. It...I would say it's not your fault, but it kind of is. But if you've reconsidered AGAIN, about wanting to be friends instead, you've really pulled out this balancing act, huh?" He laughed bitterly, but it was also with a dragging sadness.   
  
_Please don't feel that way. Please._  
   
Bakugo clenched his hands. "So... um.... bros?" Kirishima he asked and looked to him, unsure if they could even go back to that. But Bakugo didn't want to back to that. "Kirishima..." he said the best he could with lumps of ice in his throat. "Don't..." "Don't what?" "I don't want to go back..." "I know it's fun when you're the one receiving everything, but I'm tired, Bakugo." His voice was more stern, now. "You can't keep using me. I've tried and tried to get you to see all the stars I see, but you're too busy looking at the ground, embarrassed and all. And I'm sorry for that. So let's just stay friends before the path gets inevitably darker, okay--?"  
  
"NO!!"  
  
Bakugo felt everything. The searing sting of dry ice in his throat, threatening tears and dripping down to burn his heart with bubbles of acid that would leave scars incapable of being mended by anyone other than...   
Kirishima blinked, a bit surprised. "What?" "No, I... I don't want to go back to being 'bros' just because you think I'm some fucking ego-monster who's feeding off of you! I'm so fucking stupid, I'm sorry, okay!? Give me a second chance!" he pleaded, perhaps for the first time in his life, desperately. He'd always gotten what he wanted. He just had to fight or scream, right? "PLEASE!"   
  
Kirishima's eyes softened, but... "Bakugo..." he whispered, and a quiver of grief was apparent. "You never said that you loved me... you never even called me your  _boyfriend_ , not even over text...!" He was holding back tears, clearly. He didn't want to slip back into this and end up being the feeding ground again. "Kirishima, I thought... I-I thought you already knew... o-or that--" "I don't know ANYTHING about you!!" he cried in anguish. "Nothing!! Nothing at all! I wanted to know more, and you dodged my questions! I wanted to know more, and you told me to shut the fuck up and never call you cute again! I wanted to know more, and YOU acted like my efforts meant NOTHING!" He pulled at his hair in frustration, finally turning to him all the way. "You wouldn't  _understand_ , Bakugo! You're way above everyone else--you wouldn't understand about what happens down here!"  
  
Bakugo wouldn't allow that. He couldn't. Without even thinking, he snatched Kirishima by the shirt and yanked him close. "YOU HAVE IT ALL WRONG!!" he snarled and shook him. "You wouldn't FUCKING understand!" "I WANT TO! That's why this all even STARTED! But you wouldn't let me in!" he retorted and didn't back down, not even a little bit. The same determined look he wore when he confessed to him persisted even now. "I...!" Bakugo's hand was shaking. He was at a loss for words, and was about to lose his boyfriend too. The one who was always there for him, even before... "I-I....I'm sorry...."  
  
He grit his teeth, and his hold on Kirishima was getting weaker. "I just....I try... so hard every day just to be perfect... I...I thought you already thought I was perfect, so I wouldn't have to do much, but me, a fucking idiot, should have already known I wasn't  _good_ enough....!" He dropped Kirishima abruptly and screamed with frustration, violently kicking the bleachers that resounded with metallic noise. "I'm such a FUCKING idiot!! I never deserved you in the first place, but here I am thinking that I even deserved a chance!! I'll NEVER be good enough for you, just like I'm not good enough for ANYONE! I'm not good enough to be All Might's successor, I'm not good enough to be Todoroki's opponent at the fucking festival, the story of that sludge villain lives on forever as me NOT BEING GOOD ENOUGH!!!" He let out another screech of misery. "And now here I am, about to be thrown away by YOU too, the ONLY light that's in my life, like a fucking extra cookie when you thought you ate the rest, or an extra large strawberry, or the first snowflake of winter, y-you're about to j-just fade away..." He fell to his knees, defeated. He was sobbing, uncontrollably at that. He had never felt like this before. The excruciating heartache was clawing his insides. "Y-You're g-going to go, a-and there's nothing I-...I can do...." He choked on a wail and rubbed his eyes with his trembling hands. "I...I-I don't know i-if I love you, I don't KNOW if you're my boyfriend, b-but I do know I just don't want this to end...! Please...!"   
  
He turned to Kirishima, completely vulnerable and skinned. There was nothing to hide. This was him. This was how he felt every day, with or without Kirishima telling him. "P-Please...I just... allow me to try again, t-to at least be good enough for  _you_ , if nothing else on this planet..." he begged hoarsely and clenched his fists. "Please...."  
  
Kirishima... his face was that of bewilderment. He had no idea Bakugo had this many emotions, that this was all behind his angry screaming facade. A mind working endlessly to try and please not others, but himself. And it never worked, he was never happy. And hearing that he was the light to that, the beacon in his mind of grey made him gleeful beyond human speech. He could see it all now. All of it. Bakugo was confused and in dire need of guidance and appreciation. While he did give him appreciation, what the boy needed was his mind taken in another direction besides perfection. Aiming for such a goal was going to bring him down, of course, so someone to intercept those "what do I need to do to be able to be good enough" thoughts was needed. But of course he hadn't known about them in the first place, since Bakugo never opened up, but...  _I can't just dive head on into this..._  
  
"Bakugo..." he murmured and got to his knees as well. The sound of Bakugo's ugly weeping tore him to bits, it really did. "Can you promise me... that you'll reciprocate?" The blonde nodded. "I... I don't want to feel used again, Bakugo. Please. I... I know you might just be feeling pressured because I brought my love on you, and I'm sor--" "I FUCKING NEED YOU, YOU FUCKING IDIOT!!" he practically screamed and slammed his fist on the ground. "I... I need you...! And I need to learn... I-I...I'm going to do better, I promise! I'll be perfect for you this time, just don't go..."  
  
Kirishima smiled gently and pulled his hands from his face. They were damp with hot tears, as was Bakugo's tragic face, but that didn't matter. "I won't," he promised and brushed some hair from his face. "I didn't expect you to react this way... it must be really hard for you..." "Who cares..." Bakugo muttered sourly and glared down at the dirt. "I care," Kirishima chirped and kissed him gently on the cheek. "Sorry for putting you through all that... I thought you weren't interested in me at all, but I'm glad to see it's quite the opposite..."   
  
He laughed, if a bit inappropriately, and pulled him into the most loving hug he could with them both on the ground. "I'm so happy...." "Feel free to break up with my dumb ass any time you think I'm not doing good enough," his boyfriend grumbled and stared away. "What?? You don't have to be perfect. You just have to be you. I don't want to know the perfect picture, I want to know YOU, remember?" "Yeah..." He sniffed pathetically and gladly accepted the napkin Kirishima offered from his food tray. "Listen, Bakugo... if we need to take this a little slower, just tell me. I might've overwhelmed you with all the things I was doing, so..." "We're definitely taking it slower. I can't keep up with this emotional shit." He chuckled again. "Yeah, yeah, alright."  
  
They sat in silence for a moment. It was a peaceful moment, with nothing but the wind and the birds chatting in relief at the scene that just unfolded. All was well. Crisis averted.  
  
Something clenched tightly around Kirishima's hand. He felt the most tender smile crease across his face seeing Bakugo had tightened his fingers around it and was staring at the ground. "I'm sorry," he murmured, not for the first time. "I'm the worst boyfriend." "Aww. At least you said you ARE my boyfriend, so that's taking a step forward," Kirishima encouraged and nudged him. The boy huffed and seemed to be trying to say something else now. "I.... um..." He grit his teeth. Three words. Words that would leave him bare and dissected, admitting and submitting to Kirishima's emotions completely and to everything that would happen here on out in the future. But what if even those three words weren't enough? What if HE wasn't good enough? What would he have to do in order to--  
  
"Love you too," Kirishima whispered and kissed him just as the distant school bell rang.


	3. On Your Mark - 1

Bakugo hated everything about everything and the fact that he actually seriously overslept just because he was having an indulgent dream about his boyfriend. He threw on his clothes in a rush and practically bolted out the door to make a break for the bus stop. He saw Deku on the way, so he KNEW he was definitely late. (Midoriya always made sure to leave after Bakugo as to avoid dying--er, bumping into him on accident...) So upon seeing the explosion boy run past, he squawked like a choking parrot. "K-K-Kacchan, y-you're late?!" he couldn't help but exclaim in bafflement and terror. "FUCK OFF!!" Katsuki roared back, not wanting to be reminded by the broccoli haired twerp. After all, he never pressed snooze for anything, but...  _Goddamn, that was a good dream._  
  
He recalled every pristine detail... He and Kirishima had been the couch together. Kiri's couch; it was a weathered, leathery thing in his guest room that had clearly suffered a lot of wear and tear given the laborious stitches put through it... The room had a small mattress definitely meant for one, so the couch was their go to. Clearly, the Crimson Riot posters didn't stop at Kirishima's room and bled into this one as well... it also had a few gaming consoles littered in Crimson Riot stickers as well, and when you turned the TV on, the DVR showed listings of news broadcasts featuring Crimson Riot. The boy insisted it was all from a mega phase he had when he was younger... though he certainly still viewed the hero as a manly inspiration.  
  
Bakugo remembered they had watching a pretty poorly produced movie, but Kiri was definitely enjoying it. It was a movie they had both seen, action packed and over the top dramatic... Men in sunglasses spent their time racing from grand explosions. "Bakugo, you could totally do those explosions for movie companies if retail doesn't work out!" his boyfriend encouraged and moved some of his hair out of the way since it was down. "The fuck you mean if retail doesn't work out? Why am I in retail in the first place?? I'm better than that!" he had hissed back and shoved his hand in Kirishima's dumbly grinning face. "Plus, all those explosions are fake, dumbass!"  
  
He had sighed and settled back into the leather. A blanket was lazily wrapped around them both, and they were leaning on each other... for warmth, of course--the room had been pretty cold...  but... at some point, Kirishima had moved a little closer. Hairs raised on Bakugo's neck, but after glancing to the door (with three damn Crimson posters on it) to make sure it was locked... he decided not to protest. His boyfriend turned so that Bakugo was leaning back against the cushion and armrest, leaving no escape from his oncoming snuggles. He held his breath when red hair gently rubbed his chest but wore the most endearing smile. "Is it okay if touch under your shirt?" he had asked respectfully and leaned in to hear the answer since he knew Katsuki was quiet. "...Yeah," he mumbled and clenched what he could of the blanket. "Thank you, baby," redhead whispered.  
  
_Baby._  
  
Great gods above, Bakugo loved it when Eijirou called him that while holding his hand or caressing he face. He especially loved it in the dream where he.... he pushed his shirt up, kissed him slowly from stomach to chest.... then up to his neck where he delivered a delicious love bite that made him gasp. "E-Eijirou...!" "Oh? You hardly call me by my first name," he laughed and ruffled the blushing blonde's hair. "Don't do that again...!" "Whaaat? It  _really_ sounded like you wanted that again." "I do, but like...! AAARGH..." He started to sit up to flee what he knew would be an onslaught of bites, but he was already in the den of the beast, and now the jaws of the beast. "Come on baby, I know you're stubborn, but just admit it." "I did admit it, I DO like it, I..." He sank back into the couch, desire and pride battling each other internal. Alas... "....Just be gentler this time."   
  
Kirishima wasn't, and that's what he had been hoping. The thought of his steamed breath tracing his skin and sharp teeth slowly sinking into his flesh... He wanted it so bad, but he would never admit it.  
  
_I'm never going to tell him about that dream,_ Bakugo concluded in his mind as the bus stopped and he ran off to the silhouette of the school. He touched his neck fondly and sighed a bit dreamily, inevitably making his face red with embarrassment. _Stop daydreaming about his dumb puppy eyes! God, he's so cute. FUCK! GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF!_  Whether he liked it or not, he had definitely been falling harder as of lately... and while he desperately tried to stop it, his barricades turned to shambles the moment Kirishima smiled at him.   
  
"It's no use," he had been told by the smug redfucker himself. "Yeah, we'll see about that..." he muttered to himself as he walked down the hallway and into the partially filled class.   
  
"YO BAKUGOOOOO!" Denki called and winked at him. Bakugo grimaced. Around the electric rat was tape elbows, ball head, pink bitch... He had to hide the disappointment of not seeing Kirishima among them. He couldn't give away that he was even remotely attached to him, not yet... or... ever. He wasn't sure when or if they ever planned on telling, or what would prompt him to do such a thing other than a life and death situation. He shivered.  _I better not give Eiji ideas..._  
  
He begrudgingly sat in his seat near the hyperactive mouse and all his mouthy friends. The only reason he had come to acquaint them was through Kirishima, and that was definitely something he regretted. "Bakugo, did you get Kirishima's text this morning?? He's been texting me over and over to tell you," he drawled and looked down at his phone. "HEY!" Sero's tape shot out and yanked it from his hand, and he deviously scanned over the texts while Denki's hands wrestled with the tape. "'Denki, Denki, Denki, please tell Bakugo I can't come to school today! He won't answer his phone! Is he at school yet? Why isn't he replying?? Is he at school right now? Denki, this isn't the time for emojis!'" he read aloud and raised an eyebrow. "Damn, he sounds like a mother fretting over their child." "I know right?" lightning hair agreed and bitterly seized his phone after Sero retracted his tape. He peered at Bakugo who was leaning on his hand uninterested and barely paying attention to the conversation, honestly. "Why didn't you answer his damn texts? Not to mention you weren't one of the first ones in class. Are you okay???"  
  
Bakugo sighed and reached down to his phone. "None of your fuc--" he started, then paused. He blinked, feeling his pocket.  _SHIT! IT'S NOT HERE! I must've left it while rushing..._  He groaned in seething aggravation, making the other kids edge back a bit. "I'll take that as a no," Denki grumbled and proceeded to text Kirishima back. "Bakugo has been off lately," Mina agreed and leaned over the grump's desk. "Get OFF," he hissed, and gave an even more displeased look to Mineta who was enjoying the rear view. Pinky girl giggled before suddenly coming to a concerning halt and staring at him. "...What?" he growled. She reached out to his face and lifted it, to his chagrin. "WhaaAAT-?" "What's this?" she asked and traced his neck.  
  
He winced sharply and had to resist hurling her across the room, and instead slapped her hand away. "What? What?!" he demanded, aggravated. Mina pouted and got off the desk to let the other boys get a closer look. Denki, Sero, and Mineta all scooted forward and squinted... before simultaneously gasping. "HOLY SHIT, THOSE ARE HICKEYS!!!!" they all cried and pointed. Practically everyone in the class turned. Bakugo sat there, absolutely one hundred percent, without a doubt, utterly and completely dumbfounded.   
  
_It wasn't a dream._  
  
Like a magnet, everyone crowded around him in an instant. "WHO IS SHE?!" "That's a big one!" "Bakugo is dating someone?!" "I don't believe it, I think he paid her." "Bakugo's gettin' bitches!" "Who would want to be with him??" "Maybe it's a cat scratch?" More hands than he could imagine were reaching for him at trying to turn his face and touch him, and he just wouldn't stand for it. There was the iconic sound of crackling from his hand. "Fuck..." A burst of light, then an explosive noise. "OFF!!!!"   
  
The kids coughed at the smoke that the contained explosion made, but still hovered around him. He was practically simmering and tried to get up. "I'm gonna go cover it up," he grumbled, but Denki grabbed his shoulders and sat him right back down. "Noooo, no no! You're gonna tell us who this girl is right now!" he cooed and nudged him. "And I mean, if she's going for you, that means I DEFINITELY have a chance, amirite? Ahaha--"  _ **BOOM!!!**_  
  
_Thud._  
  
Bakugo sighed and kicked his twitching body to the side.. "Well, you can't cover much of anything up now," Jiro pointed out from his right and was mischievously twirling her earlobe. "I mean... does she go to this school?" Tokoyami glanced from the desk he was sitting on and spoke. "Did you approach her or the other way around?" Mineta raised his hand to add to the questions. "Does she have big bo--"  ** _BOOM!!!  
  
_**_Thud._  
  
Bakugo sat there with a strangely flustered and uncomfortable expression for someone who was always so defensive and shouty. He was NOT mentally prepared for this situation, despite how much he had been thinking of ways to slip out. Escape was nearly impossible, as the students were surrounding him like hyenas, staring at him with hungry eyes to satisfy their ravenous curiosity. He didn't want to give them the satisfaction...but perhaps he could lead them on a path completely opposite of Kirishima. "She...goes to this school," he admitted slowly.   
  
The class broke into gasps and whispers, but it quickly silenced when Ojiro stammered,"W-Wait, is she in this class??" Bakugo stared for a moment, considering the idea of causing total drama and chaos as they all fought to figure out who was the lucky lady. But leading them on a scavenger hunt on a larger scale was a lot more amusing. "No, she's not." "Ooooh! Is she pretty? I bet she's pretty!" Toru giggled and bounced around, as unsettling as it was since she was invisible. "Do you loooove her?" Mina teased and poked him. He flicked her hand away and growled,"Absolutely not." "So tsundere!" "What?!"  
  
"Literally none of you are in your seats, astounding," Aizawa droned from the podium. All the kids yelped from his magical appearance, all except Bakugo. They scrambled to get to their seats, but the teacher was already talking about how they had to run ten laps around the school as punishment. The boy was certainly grateful for setting him free of the burden of being eaten by sharks attracted to the scent of denial, but... _Ah, fuck... I really have to think about what I'm going to say... how to avoid them... ect..._  He groaned.  _And Kirishima isn't here, so that makes this even better, fantastic._  
  
_Well, here we go._


	4. On Your Mark - 2

He'd done it. Bakugo had made it through the day in one piece and honestly...he was pretty proud of himself.  
  
He avoided crowds and questions with well thought out obscurity, strategically planned bathroom visits, feigning innocence, and of course, explosions. Now that it was the end of the day, no one was bothering him since everyone who asked received a different puzzle piece to try and connect with another to see who this imaginary girl was.  _Am **I**  just not allowed to have someone?_ he thought with virulence.  He swore it was all a team effort, because EVERYONE got a question with him today.  He said all kinds of shit that just barely connected, and before he walked out of class, he glimpsed all of them congregated together with  _notes_ about her, goddammit. Not to mention he often glimpsed the others glancing up from obnoxious newspapers and fake mustaches when he talked to others. Still baffled, he tried to think of all the dumb things they bothered to ask.   
  
Koda and Todoroki were too quiet to ask him questions, and for that he was thankful. As for the rest...  
  
"Does she like sweets?" Sato demanded and loomed over him with a speculating gaze. "Sometimes?" Bakugo answered awkwardly.  
  
"How long have you two been dating?" Yaoyozuro asked a bit too excitedly. "We're on and off, I kinda hate her," he said dismissively.  
  
"What's her quirk?" Ojiro asked, to which he replied with a laugh and sneered,"As if I'd tell you."  
  
"Is she fun? She's gotta be fun!" Toru insisted, and he didn't stop her from trying to push her own narrative. "Yep, she sure is."  
  
"Favorite color?" Jiro interrogated, eyes narrowed and gaze tense. "A minty green," he replied curtly. "Fave music?" "Modern." "Eye color?" "Classified." "Any siblings?" "Three." "Does she paint her nails?" "Sometimes." "Does she like cats?" "No." "Last movie you watched together?" "Quirkalicious. Her pick, not mine." "Quirka...? UGH." The girl sighed in defeat, quickly losing interest in some girl so far out from her tastes.  
  
"Does she do her homework on time!?" Iida inquired loudly with a side of vicious arm slices through the air. "Uh, she's dating me, what do you think?" he scoffed and raised an eyebrow. The class president wasn't sure how to take that, given how Bakugo was a delinquent, but still did his homework, but was also not very well behaved, sooo... [This was exactly what Katsuki wanted, of course.]  
  
"Sooo, did you sneak into her window last night or?" Sero teased and bounced his eyebrows. "Fuck no," he hissed, redfaced.   
  
"Is she free tonight?" Denki asked smoothly and winked. This case in particular unsurprisingly included a violent explosion.  
  
"Where did you go on your first date?" Shoji's many mouths prodded at him, making him slightly distressed. "The festival," he snipped, making sure to skiddaddle before he was asked to specify which.  
  
"Does she like jewelry and wear it all the time???" Mina kept bouncing up and down, making Bakugo nauseous... so he only nodded. "Yeah, sure."  
  
"Does she have a dark side?" Bakugo could only stare dully at Tokoyami for such a dumb inquiry.   
  
"Have you fucked?" Mineta wondered, earning himself an explosion.  
  
"Ahahah, a-a-ah, ahaha, um, e-e-eh, e-er," Deku's incomprehensible, anxious, fucking ANNOYING babbling went on as he tried to ask whatever was on the crumpled paper they went through the trouble of whipping up for him. Katsuki groaned and walked away, having better things to do.  
  
"Who's the reacher and who's the settler?" Uraraka purred and even went as far as to nudge and wink at him. Bakugo didn't know what the hell she even meant, so said "Me" before any further nudging and winking ensued.   
  
"Is she always sparkling?" Aoyama cooed and struck a forced, flamboyant pose. "If not, she's not worth it!" "Yep," he agreed stoically.   
  
"Is she Kirishima?" Tsu's stuffy voice asked right before Bakugo turned to go down the stairs to leave. He staggered, completely caught off guard. He felt cold sweat envelope him. He couldn't hide the shock in his face as a whole list of consequences and teases and belittling comments surged through his head.  _How? Does she know?! Just act natural!_  "What? No," he spat obviously, but... he couldn't meet her eyes. He was scared, frankly.  _It's too soon. This is all too soon, really...!_  "We can talk about it somewhere else," the frog girl suggested and tapped her chin. Bakugo stared at her. _It could be a trap. But amphibian girl here is smart and observant, I know that, so lying might make it worse... and she's not really the type to start rumors despite being friends with Mina, so..._  He clenched his fists tightly as nervous smoke wafted from them. "...Fine."  
  
They had taken to a little cafe near Tsu's house since she needed to be home soon in order take care of her siblings, but otherwise, they got down to business. "How did you know?" Bakugo growled through grit teeth, not wanting to show how incredibly terrified he was. If she knew, who else did? Was it that obvious? Despite all of his plans and setbacks...? "Well, I know a starry eyed couple when I see one, ribbit," she admitted and waved down the barista to bring the drinks to them. A steaming cup of decaf coffee for Bakugo, and a hot chocolate for her. "And you two have definitely been closer as of late..." He was disturbed by how she flicked out her rope-like tongue to taste the drink before picking it up with her hands. "How do you know that??" "You never turned around in your seat before. And I noticed you were starting to, if only to give Kirishima annoyed looks or affectionate glances... it's pretty cute." "I guess I'll stop looking at him," he grunted and sipped his own beverage. He flinched from her flicking his forehead and watched her shake her head.  
  
"No, Bakugo, I'm sure I'm the only one who noticed... not to mention you already put everyone else on a wild goose chase, ribbit," she assured and sank back into her seat. "You can't let others get in the way of your relationship, you know. Because with more things between you and your partner, the farther apart you become." He clenched his drink tightly along with his heart.  _I know that. I know that more than anyone,_  he thought tiredly and stared down into his browned reflection. "I'm just not emotionally prepared to come out," he murmured and glanced away. "I don't think I could handle the pressure of everyone else as it is right now. I can barely handle the pressure of this first relationship, honestly." "Is it not working out? Ribbit?" she asked curiously and tilted her head. He laughed as bitterly as his coffee. "He tried to break up with me a few months ago." "Oh dear."   
  
Her mostly blank stare seemed pitying for a moment. "I know you have a lot of baggage Bakugo, whether or not you want to admit it," she croaked and drank some more of her hot cocoa. "And knowing Kirishima, I'm sure he is helping you with that... you have a good boyfriend, you know. Don't waste him." "I knooow," he groaned and covered his slightly pink face with a hand. "I'm glad you know. And I wish the two of you luck in your relationship... and if you need help with figuring ways to come out, I could give you some advice." "Thanks." He watched her put down her now empty cup and scoot out of her chair. "I have to go to my siblings now, though. My lips are sealed," she promised and hopped out of her chair with her backpack in hand. "Yeah," he murmured a bit fondly. He would have never been able to actually come to a cafe with someone from class he didn't care about if it wasn't for Kirishima scrubbing up his social skills and putting his ass out there. He was grateful. Truly, truly grateful.   
  
Tsu reached in her bag to get the money to pay, but he already put the yen on the table. She might've smiled, it was pretty hard to tell with her... She turned to leave before pausing and looking back to him. "Oh, Bakugo. You should tell him not to bite so hard next time," she said too offhandedly and loudly for this little cafe before casually going out the door. He wanted to slam his head through the table, knowing how abashed he look. He grumbled as he got up, and reached for his phone for at least the one millionth time that day before remembering it wasn't there... and then remembered something even worse.  
  
_FUCK!! The little brats Denki and Mineta probably filled Kirishima in on the gossip...!_  He found himself breaking into a run to get home.  _He knows I wouldn't cheat on him, but he's probably feeling atrocious knowing how I feel about public marks and such.... and I haven't texted him back even ONCE today because...AAAAGH. I hate myself. Fuck. He probably thinks I'm mad at him. WHY IS THIS MY LIFE._  
  
After an anxious train ride, he zoomed on home, practically parkoured over all his furniture, upstairs, and into his room where his phone lay on the ground after having vibrated from so many messages. He immediately snatched it up to find over twenty anxiety charged messages and a couple of missed calls, all from Kirishima. He scrolled through to realize that the first fifteen or so were from the morning when he was trying to explain why he couldn't come and such... but the remainder...  
  
"denki told me that some girl marked you up ;)"  
  
"wonder who's fault that is"  
  
"you know, since you were with me all day yesterday, getting nibbled on"  
  
"a bit peculiar a girl got to you too, hmmmmm?"  
  
"it sounded like you liked it, so i meaaaaan not my fault ;P"  
  
"<3<3<3 love you"  
  
Bakugo's worry over Kirishima immediately dissipated.  _THAT FUCKER DOESN'T REGRET ANYTHING!_  He resisted the urge to explode his device on the spot and merely texted back a "fuck you too" and collapsed on his bed, completely exhausted. He watched as Eijirou replied with the stupid "lmaooooo" he always sent, to which he answered, "im not letting you borrow notes." Immediately after, the phone buzzed and he picked up. "What, Kiri?" he griped blandly and stared at his ceiling. "Dude, I was joking!" came his melodic voice and admirable laughter. "Now, tell me everything that happened today! Denki already told me, but I want to hear your version."  
  
He  _wanted_  to hear his version. That encouraged a little blossom of love in his heart, and for at least a moment, he forgave everything that ensued today because of Kirishima. The fact that he had someone to talk to after school now, someone who WOULD bite him when he wanted, someone who cared... he smiled appreciatively and felt himself relax. "I love you," he murmured and rubbed his neck longingly. He heard him spit take over the phone. This was followed by coughing, and a distorted, "W-Wait, what did you just say?" "Anyway, let me start from the top...." "No, wait! Dude, what did you say?!" "Shut up and listen, okay?? It all started because of this dream I had..."


	5. Butterflies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guys im so sorry my chapters are so short omg. writing bakushima is a hobby for me and i do it from 12 AM - 7AM SO DONT BLAME ME

Kirishima woke up every morning excited and alive. Love surged through his veins and the thought of a certain someone pushed his face into a smile. Even if everyday he didn't get to kiss Bakugo, he got to see him. His boyfriend. HIS boyfriend. Bakugo. Who was his boyfriend. Katsuki Bakugo: Eijirou Kirishima's boyfriend. [The sequel, since they almost broke up, but damn, was he glad they didn't.] The butterflies in his stomach had settled down a couple months ago, but whenever Katsuki gave even the tiniest ghost of the smile because of him, well... his heart went straight to fluttering again.  
  
He slipped right through the gates of school and admired the towering blue building where he would learn to be a wonderful hero. _I wonder if Bakugo and I will be able to work as partners in the future?_  he thought and sauntered into the building. _He could blow things up, I could protect the innocents from it... that'd be pretty cool! We could spend our lives together saving lives!_ He imagined an older, somehow more handsome Bakugo and his glistening body emerging from a pile of smoking rubble whilst bearing an armful of children. "Worry not," he whispered to them and gently brushed their hair. "'Tis safe now." He nearly burst into laughter.  _Apparently my ideal future Bakugo is an actor..._  
  
He always tried to imagine their future together, but it was pretty hard when he never even knew what would be going down within the next week. For the first few weeks of dating, Bakugo's only consistency was grating neglect, but after him opening up even a little more, he was showing that he was full of contrasting surprises. One day he would actually smile back at him in class, another he would almost formally execute him in front of everyone for texting him "send nudes" during a lesson. One day he'd plead Kirishima not to leave marks, the next he'd beg him to as a proud medal to wear around despite him not telling anyone who they were from. [Everyone still believed his secret girlfriend story.] One day he'd be saying, "Great gods above, I fuckin' hate you." The next he would call him in the middle of the night just to tell him the opposite.  
  
It was like watching a butterfly constantly come in and out of its chrysalis. Born anew and ready to show the world its dazzling new colors before thinking twice and hiding back into that withered shell only to repeat the cycle. But it was better than him being that angry little caterpillar he used to know. At times, he was afraid he might turn back into it.... but he had faith in Bakugo.  
  
Usually.  
  
Sometimes he said offhand comments that left Kirishima speculating a lot. They had been relaxing at the mysteriously cleared up beach when he told Katsuki, "You need a better hugging tolerance, buddy." His boyfriend reeled in disgust and confusion. "One, did you  _seriously_ just call me  _buddy?_ Two, I'll have the  _best_ hug tolerance or whatever, you'll see!" Or when they had gone to their favorite cafe and he declared,"You know Kiri, one day I'm gonna buy you this cafe. It'll be the best boyfriend gift on this planet." Or when they were cuddled together after a steamy session of making out, where he breathlessly promised, "I'll get better, I-I promise... way better, better than anyone..." Looking back, Eijirou couldn't help but frown.  _Does that mean he's seeing this relationship more as a competition? Is he trying to prove to himself, yes, he can date another guy and pull through all the relationship stuff? Am I just a hurdle to his eternally distant finish line for perfection in all things?_    
  
He couldn't resist a troubled sigh. Bakugo was always trying to be perfect and better every second of the day whether he realized it or not. Well, he definitely realized it, but he didn't realize it was  _so_ unhealthy. Everyday Kiri wondered what it would take to snap him awake, to make him see the bigger picture instead of all the tiny little details he felt like he needed to fill in. The picture that real men weren't perfect, but owned their flaws. Same with heroes. Kind of. With heroes, you couldn't mess up because lives could be endangered, but Katsuki could at least let go a little in day to day life. He might not be comfortable with changing, but goddammit Kiri loved him. And to love was to want the best for someone, and while wanting it was easy, taking the actual steps was hard. Especially when your boyfriend was Bakugo, but...  _He himself said he wanted to take it slow._  
  
Kirishima gave the daily jealous glance to the elevator that was meant only for staff and specially quirked people. _Time to go up about six goddamn flights,_  he thought, slightly annoyed, but... there was a prize at the end of these stairs, and he knew it. He smiled to himself and clapped his hands together. _These stairs are a gateway and a morning workout! Don't get gloomy, you'll see him soon!_  He found himself grinning brazenly as he bolted on up, excitement replacing his gloominess and uncertainty. That was until he crashed into someone. "What the _FUCKING ASSFUCKING FUCK!?"_  an enraged voice snarled.   
  
Others might have been scared, but Kirishima gasped and got right back up. "Bakugo!!" he squealed and beamed at his boyfriend's suffering as he struggled to get up. He bit his lip and realized  _oh haha I just collided into him with the speed of a comet woops_  and reached to help him up. "Don't FUCKING touch me you  _disgusting_ \--" he hissed and glared at him with SUCH hate before becoming aware of who he was. It made Kiri pretty happy to see all the anger drain from his face and turn to that of instant regret. It was a shame no one else would ever be able to experience it firsthand, though, as they'd probably be a pile of ashes before they could get a word out...   
  
Bakugo "tch"ed and still rejected his hand ["No gayass public handholding!"] and rose, dusting himself off. "Sorry," he murmured, another word no one really got to hear from him. Kirishima only smiled bashfully at him, not even hiding that he wanted to have a kissing marathon on his face. He loved his skin and his surprised stammers, his hesitant eyes and gentle hand squeezes. All of him only belonged to him, and Kiri tried not to let it get to his head. Bakugo was his. All of him.  _His_. Willingly! Some how he,  _Eijirou Kirishima,_  was able to crack Katsuki Bakugo enough to become HIS  _boyfriend_! He had to give himself a pat on the back every now and then for such a feat. Even if nobody else in the world knew it, he did, and Bakugo definitely knew. It probably bothered him, actually, hence why he didn't romanticize it or tease him too much about it... but one day everyone would know. He would make sure of it--well, at least when Bakugo was ready.  _Only_ when Bakugo was ready.  
  
The blonde was always so off-put by his cheery character towards him and it showed in his awkward expression. "What??" he hissed and bared his teeth at him. He was even more baffled when the redhead pulled out his phone and started swiping and typing away. He felt his own phone buzz and took a peek at it. A text.  
  
"can i kiss you? right now? please?"  
  
Kirishima bounced in anticipation despite knowing that Bakugo would probably decline, given the pink in his face. But he didn't know that saying no to him was becoming more difficult the more they were together... Bakugo glanced cautiously before giving him a defeated look along with a defeated text.  
  
"fine. quickly."  
  
Before he could text any more, Kiri flew forward and seized both his hands, accidentally making him drop his phone. He pressed his mouth to Bakugo's before he could complain, and clutched his fingers tightly. He had to resist giggling upon feeling him press back. After Bakugo hesitantly pulled away, Kiri gave his longing face a barrage of cheer-up kisses. After ten too many quick pecks, he was shoved away, but not by much. He noticed that ever since the first time he'd been pushed away from kissing him, that the force became weaker and weaker. "S-stop," Kastuki murmured softly and turned around. "Before anyone sees..." "'Kay," Kirishima chirped and skipped on ahead to give him some time to collect himself. But he still gave him a cordial flash of his teeth because godDAMN he loved him more than anyone.   
  
Bakugo smiled back momentarily before playing it off with picking up his phone and wiping his face with his sleeve.  _I hope no one saw..._  
  
But someone did see.


	6. Strike! - 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> things 'bout to get fucked ya'll

The doors slammed open. They gays had arrived.  
  
They had decided to go on a date after the final exam, because damn, was that stressful. They were both in a particularly unpleasant mood since Kirishima had failed and Bakugo had been aggravated beyond relief about being paired up with Deku... So they both decided on an activity that would leave their frustrations at the door. Something that was both energetic and fun in a place no one would think of finding them. Something that would leave them sweaty and fighting for dominance.  
  
Bowling!  
  
Bakugo hadn't gone bowling in a while, but when Kirishima suggested it, he figured it'd be pretty sweet to go out, bowl, kick his ass in front of everyone... Though his arms still ached from the exam, a little 15 pound bowling ball never hurt anyone. Plus, it would be a good warm up before their stupid summer camp or whatever that was in a week or so. Honestly, he wanted to spend as much time with Kirishima as he could before they wouldn't be able to do any of their... "gay shit" together. ["We aren't doing anything in the woods while we're there, you fucking baboon!!"]   
  
Kirishima was frankly completely frustrated with his performance at the exam, and could only hope camp would help improve him... Bakugo wasn't the best at encouragement, but he appreciated him coming out with him to clear up both of their minds.   
  
"You sure your arms are okay?" he asked as they walked into the dimly lit building.   
  
"We're already here so it doesn't matter," the dirty blonde huffed in response and took a look around.  
  
This place was  _long_. As they walked on dark carpet to get to the receptionist, there were several large domains to their left. An arcade full of machines spitting lights and mashes of electronic music and sound effects, the concession and sign up, and an area farther ahead that served as the bar and adult hangout. To the right were brightly lit lanes with each lane having its own bowling ball contraption and little cushiony sitting area not too far away. The glistening wooden flooring abruptly cut at a few steps that lead up to where he and his boyfriend were at the moment. At the end of the lanes were the caverns the bowling pins resided in, but the dark abyss was contrasted by the very colorful wall art presented around them. He scanned the groups of giddy people playing for anyone even remotely recognizable so that he knew what to set their "gay limits" at.  _Seems like there's no one._  
  
They had been dating for around 8 months at this point, growing more with each passing day. They were pretty much comfortable together now, except when it came to public appearances, of course. Bakugo was considerably less flustered by Kiri's approaches and was even making some of his own. (Kinda. He smashed his face dead into his boyfriend's without any warning once.) But they still had that besties-bro vibe. "We're like bros who kiss," Kirishima once called it, and it took all of Bakugo's might not to kick him into the next life where he could rephrase what he just said. But no matter how cozy they were all alone and snuggled up, blast-hands just wasn't ready to come out to the others.   
  
"This is about us, not them," he had said.  
  
"You sure make it seem like its about them," Kirishima scoffed matter-of-factly and raised a doubtful eyebrow.   
  
"W-Well...! I just don't want them involved or--"   
  
"Teeeasing you?" The blonde had flushed an impressive pink of denial, so he knew he had hit the nail on the head.   
  
"Really, Bakugo? You're afraid of some playground insults?"   
  
"You teasing me is enough! We're dropping this conversation!"   
  
Redhead had ended it there, but it was becoming increasingly unbearable to keep such a secret from his friends. He hated having to cover up their tracks and lie... He could tell Denki was getting somewhat suspicious, but the boy was convinced a manly man like Kiri wasn't, no,  _couldn't_ be getting frisky with another man. But that just wasn't true.   
  
"Oi, I paid. Let's go change shoes," Kirishima suggested after they registered their lane.   
  
"How long do we have the lane for?" Bakugo asked as they headed over to one of the shoe racks.   
  
Kiri tapped his chin in thought. "Uhhh until the place closes."   
  
His mouth dropped open. "Fucking  _what?!"_  As of right now, it was late noon. But the rock boy only snickered at his friend struggling to  forge curses and excuses. Otherwise, he banged a solidified fist on his chest.  
  
"We're going all out, man!" He pulled out his phone with his other hand. "Oh, we're also going to be playing the newlywed game and what not. I have so many websites with so many questions for couples bookmarked, you have no idea."   
  
Katsuki resisted a groan and tried not to break under the glow of his teeth.  
  
"Dude, it's gonna be great! We're gonna get a sick workout and know more about each other! Isn't that  _snazzy_?"   
  
"Snazzy," he repeated stiffly.   
  
"Yeah! Now come on, let's get started."  
  
They were almost kicked out as soon as they began. The first few games were full of nothing but screeching and hurtling the ball down the lane so hard it left dents. Bakugo would explode the ball with excessive force so that it zipped across the lane like a race horse on steroids and smashed into the back of the throat of the pit. He mostly got wild strikes, but when he missed even one pin...  
  
 ** _"FUCKING RIGGED ASS BOWLING PINS WITH FUCKING DOLPHINSHITTING MAGNETS AT THE MAYO-FUCKING BOTTOM!!!"_**  he roared vehemently with an aura of rage layering him like the the mantle of the planet. He screamed to the heavens and exploded what was left on his tray of food. Kirishima pretended as though he was texting, but was indeed recording his love's meltdown. He couldn't resist bursting into perplexed laughter.  
  
"Dude, it was one pin!" "FUCK DOES IT MATTER?! SMUG ASS SITTING OVER THERE LOOKING AT FUCKING OSTRICH PORN!" The cackles were borderline inaudible because of how hard Kiri was laughing. "What?? Is that what you think about on the day to day basis, Katsuki?" "FUCK NO!!! GAAAAAAAAH!!!"  
  
After this went on for some time, they were kindly asked by the staff to tone down the volume, language, and explosions if they wanted to stay. Bakugo kindly suggested they should tone down the bitchiness if they wanted their money. Kirishima kindly promised his boyfriend definitely didn't mean that and that they would comply.  
  
So now it was evening and they had definitely mellowed down from infernos to embers. Their last outfits got too soaked (Bakugo's became a literal firehazard) and so they changed. Kiri's hair was down now and he wore a black t-shirt with some athletic shorts while his boyfriend sported a white tank top that said "Probably Better Than You" and some khakis that went to knee length.  
  
Kirishima casually rolled his ball, and was indeed annoyed that it went straight into the gutter. While he was definitely tiring out, his hunger for the competition was strong, and so was Bakugo's. But the best part was the trivia questions they started doing. If you got a strike, you didn't have to answer anything. But for anything else, whatever number of pins were left behind, you had to do half that many questions. This applied for both throws, unless you missed every pin on the first. Silly Kirishima here missed every pin on both, making Bakugo snicker triumphantly. Ten pins left unhindered meant five questions.  
  
"You're losing your luster," he pointed out obviously and scrolled on Kirishima's phone for questions. He didn't notice he was being flicked off, because wow there were  _so_ many questions. And some of them were so  _dirty_ \-- did he really want the answers? Where the hell did Kirishima even find this shit? "Ummmm..." He blushed red seeing one of the questions was "spit or swallow?"  _GODDAMMIT KIRISHIMA WITH THIS FUCKING GAY SHIT..._  
  
He hastily swiped back up to the less naughty questions and sighed. "U-Um... what's something you're glad you'll never have to do again?" he asked and glanced up to Kirishima who was drinking from his water bottle. He was kinda hot the way he craned his head back to take in the ice cold drink and the way he sleeked back his hair. He cast a mysterious look in his direction, causing him to avert his gaze.  _Come on, Katsuki, don't get all hot and clammy now._  
  
"Umm, I hope I'll never have to try and break up with you again," Kirishima replied in a considerate tone and put his bottle back on the table. He put his hands on his hips as he thought harder. Bakugo was slightly offended.  _What could be worse than breaking up with me?_ "Or maybe I'm more glad I'll never have to walk my neighbor's dog again since they moved. That dog was so evil."   
  
"What," Bakugo said dully. "You'd rather break up with me than walk that dog?"  
  
Kirishima nodded shamelessly, instantaneously turning the blonde's face into a scowl. "Listen, you don't know that dog like I do."  
  
"What do you mean?! How bad could it have possibly been?!" he demanded scornfully and threw one of their empty cups at him while he was at it. They had eaten and drank a  _lot_ through their work out, to the point where the concession straight up told them to go across the street to the fast food place so they didn't run out of stock.  
  
Kirishima rocked on his heels thoughtfully. He didn't sound very hateful. It was more like he had already forgiven and forgotten. "I mean, it always dug up my yard and attacked me... it was to the point that I couldn't go outside to play because it might jump over the fence and bite me. And yet, since my neighbors were too old to walk it, they asked me to. I got paid, at least, but definitely not enough."  
  
Bakugo stared with such a deadpan and unmoved look that the redhead barely refrained from laughing. "Is this a joke?" he growled and tried to peer deep into Kiri's face for something other than stifled amusement.   
  
"Not neccesarily~" he purred mischievously and stuck his tongue out. Katsuki grunted dismissively and decided to drop the topic.   
  
"Whatever. Next question..."  
  
"I already answered five questions, Bakugo, weren't you paying attention?"  
  
He paused blankly.  _Wait a minute...._  The flames inside were coming back. At first his annoyance was a gentle bubbling, but now it was blistering. "DAMMIT KIRISHIMA! You fucking slime!" he spat and shoved past him so he could get to bowling already. The redhead laughed at the insult and cooed, "Slime? That's a new one. I wonder what other kind of thoughts you've been having that consist of things that are wet and sticky."   
  
That throw was definitely a miss.  
  
"KIRI! SHIMA!" Bakugo croaked and whirled around to him with a horribly mortified expression seeped with crimson. His jaw hung open and occasionally twitched in an attempt to form words. He had no fucking clue how to feel about those words, the mere  _suggestion_ , the fact that there was even a  _possibility_ they might ever even...! His heart was choking in all sorts of ways, and he was genuinely concerned if he was about to have a severe palpitation of some kind. He finally forced enough sound through his choked squeaks form at least three words. "Don't...! JUST DON'T....!"   
  
"Hm? Don't what? I was just wondering," Kiri chirped casually and had the gall to just look off disinterestedly. This prompted a strangled chihuahua squeal from his partner.  
  
"NOOO! You're just saying fucking gay fuckkity FUCK to FUCK--I-I, um, THAT--" Bakugo really didn't like thinking about doing those kinds of things with Kirishima, frankly. It was just so... not okay. Kirishima was his boyfriend, not his... fuckbuddy. Or something. If he wasn't prepared to come out, he wasn't prepared to go  _in._ He grit his teeth together to stop his shaking jaw and hissed through them, "Don't distract me with that... NONSENSE again, okay?! That's playing dirty!"  
  
Kirishima looked at him smugly.  
  
"NO! STOP! NOT  _THAT_ DIRTY, JUST--" He swiftly turned away and exasperatedly propelled his bowling ball across the floor. With a loud clanging of pins, only 2 remained, which meant answering one question. _I swear if he asks me a dirty question.  
_  
"Do you like having your hair pulled Bakugo? Hmmmm?" Kirishima purred seductively and arched his eyebrows in a curious fashion. The statement was completely lost on Bakugo, given his confused expression.  
  
 _Eh? My hair pulled?? The fuck does that have to do with anything?_  
  
"...No?" His mouth pulled back into an awkward half apologetic half totally confused frown. "Am I supposed to? Do people like that? Is that a couple thing?? Why would you ask me that?"Kirishima seemed deeply disappointed by the lack of stutters and stammers from the boyfriend and sighed.  _That was anticlimactic._  
  
"Oh well. Your turn."  
  
The questions went on as evening blurred into nighttime. Unsurprisingly, more people were coming into the alley for parties and such, but the two remained resolute in their position as lane number 10 or whatever. They were now just lazily slouched together in the crook of the little couch their area came with as they drowsily asked each other things. The boys were both leaning with their sides against each other, and Kiri had his arm around Bakugo's shoulder. They occasionally shifted so that they felt the other more, but also made sure not to "look too gay." But it was so deep in the night that people were starting to cycle out anyway, and staff were cleaning up alongside volunteer workers.  
  
"Bakugay, if--"  
  
"Don't."  
  
"--you could write a note to your younger self but it could only be three words, what would it say?"  
  
"'Don't befriend Deku.'"  
  
"Ouch. I really do wonder how you'd turn out if you never knew him...huh..."  
  
"Whatever, fuck him. Anyway, Kiri, when was the last time you cried?"  
  
"Um, I was thinking about if I lost you the other day..."  
  
"Bullshit. Won't happen." Kirishima couldn't help smiling and ruffled Bakugo's hair slightly before getting on with his question.  
  
"Bakugo, if you woke up tomorrow with no fear, what would be the first thing you do?"  
  
"Tell everyone about our relationship. The problem comes in the day after, however..."  
  
"Would you regret it?"  
  
"Depends. Ummm... let's see... What kind of behavior can you not tolerate?"  
  
"Dude, don't get me started on cheating. It just isn't right. Not on a test, not on your partner. I also hate lying. I hate dishonesty in general, really." His voice was soft and he didn't look at him. "I really do."   
  
Bakugo glanced to him, and found himself desperately wanting to kiss that pained and somber face back to health. He knew he was asking a lot of Kirishima when he begged him not to tell, and despite how good they were getting at this whole thing, he knew it was wearing on him little by little. Kiri was a good guy with a good set of morals; why was he hiding his boyfriend? Well, for his boyfriend's sake of course, but... why did  _he_ have to be so afraid?  _He probably thinks I'm ashamed of him,_  Bakugo realized slowly and felt a weight descend upon him.  _That's not the case...I just... I don't know...._  Despite the twisting feeling in his gut, he reached and held Kirishima's hand just to promise him that no, he wasn't regretful of anything because of him. It was something much deeper he couldn't exactly put into words, and he hated that he would be keeping his boyfriend in an ocean of silence before he could find the proper things to say that would keep them afloat.  
  
"I'm sorry," was all he could whisper for now, and planted a kiss on Kirishima's forehead before even looking around first. And that was something he'd never done before. The red head's eyes widened and he seemed completely stunned that he did such a thing. It made Bakugo a bit proud, actually.  _Who knows, maybe that day of no fear could be tomorrow,_  he thought with a gentle smile down at Kirishima. Except Kirishima just kept staring, completely frozen. ".....What?"  
  
"Dude," he hissed urgently, and it was then that Bakugo realized his gaze was looking  _past_ him. He slowly followed it, and time practically stopped.  
  
A green haired boy stood atop the steps with a trembling form and bowling ball clutched to his chest. He even had the audacity to speak.  
  
"....H-H-Hi, K-Kacchan," he squeaked and shot him a bashful smile.


	7. Strike! - 2

Nothing was alive. Everything was empty. The universe was fake.  
  
It just had to be.  
  
This couldn't be happening. It couldn't. It _couldn't._  
  
Bakugo couldn't even bring himself to let go of Kirishima's hand. All the warmth he had just felt died as though it had been hit by a car. And oh, he wanted to be hit by a car right now. His whole body instantly became vacant, filled with nothing but ice and insecurities. He was too frozen to even think beyond "Why?"  _Why is this happening to me? Is this happening? Is this actually happening?_ It felt like Deku was the only thing he could see in this black void. And Deku could see him and Kirishima. He also just saw that kiss. And saw they were still holding hands.  
  
 _Is this actually happening?_  
  
Honestly, Bakugo didn't know if he was breathing, but he wouldn't mind passing out and/or dying right about now. He could see the future now. Midoriya goes off and snickers about their relationship to Uraraka who goes and tells Iida who goes and tells the entire class because fuck, he was so loud. So loud. The silence between him, his boyfriend, and this  _intruder_ was so loud it was deafening. What was there to say? What  _could_ they say? Bakugo's sweat usually wasn't cold, but it was now.  
  
"Um..." Deku had begun speaking or something, it was hard to tell when his head felt like it was underwater. (He wished that it was.)  
  
"I-I, um, I won't tell anyone, I-I promise! S-So, uh, b-bye, ahaha..."  
  
Now came the rage after the snowstorm. It was like a volcano was birthing itself through the frigid skin of the arctic. The smoke and heat of the mountain was evaporating all the frosted fear that had covered him, and left nothing but boiling  _animosity_. Did Deku  _actually_ think that he believed him when he said he wasn't going to tell anybody? Much less that he was going to let him leave here? Alive? Searing hatred--complete and utter LOATHING--was catching his body aflame. Kirishima could probably feel him shaking, but he knew it wasn't from fear. Deku gulped seeing the lines of fury beginning to crease on Bakugo's face and the way he bared his teeth like a ravenous wolf about to go on a massacre. And oh, he was. After all, Midoriya couldn't tell anyone if he wasn't alive. Green hair took a step back, one step too many.  
  
Bakugo let out a venomous exhale, and that was all Kirishima needed to hear before he let go of his hand and hurried between the two boys. "U-Um...! Let's talk about this outside? Please?" he pleaded and gently took the bowling ball Midoriya was holding away from him in case he felt prompted to throw it at his boyfriend.   
  
"W-well, I'm doing, a-ah, volunteer work, so--" the boy began, but Bakugo cut him off with a sharp snarl.   
  
" **NO.**  We're going outside,  _now._ "  
  
 **\--**  
  
Kirishima realized too late that going out behind the building where there was nothing but a flickering lampost and trash bags was a terrible idea. Not to mention it was pretty secluded with not much other than the shrubbery surrounding the empty parking.  
  
 _"Dude!"_  Kiri exclaimed as Bakugo wasted no time slamming Midoriya against the wall. The boy choked back a pained noise and cringed when his face was snatched into a hand a little too close to exploding for comfort.  
  
"Deku." The blonde forced his name through locked teeth. His voice was a low, disturbing hiss. "Do you even  _remotely_ understand how  _livid_ I am right now?" Midoriya gulped and opened his mouth to speak, but light and pain crackled across his cheek. "Say one thing to piss me off and I'll blow your fucking head off." His shaded eyes flashed to Kirishima as well, suggesting he stay put. He glowered back at the trembling boy and contemplated him for a moment.  
  
"U-Um, Kacchan, I-I, er... I don't care that you're dating Kirishima, a-and I have no reason to tell anyone! I don't want to, a-anyway, especially since you don't want me to," Midoriya stated honestly and tried to keep eye contact so that he knew he was telling the truth, but it was hard to look directly a blazing sun that lusted for nothing more than his destruction. "A-And everyone thinks you're dating some girl, s-so..."  
  
"So? Doesn't mean you won't slip up."  
  
"I-I kinda want to live, s-so I'll make sure not to, really...! I haven't told anyone this whole time, s-so--" He squeaked and cut himself off.  
  
Kirishima blinked, and Bakugo's darkness increased tenfold. "...What do you mean  _this whole time???"_ His hand slid down to his throat, and he barely refrained from snapping his neck right then in there. "THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN?!"  
  
"I-I, um, well...!!"  
  
"SPEAK!!!"  
  
"I was heading t-to class one day, and you know h-how I always leave after you, right? B-But we both usually get there early e-except when I'm injured, or depending on if you're taking longer than usua--" He gagged feeling fingers press down on his sweaty throat to get him to the point. "I-I saw you and Kirishima kiss on the stairs!"  
  
Bakugo stared, while Kirishima hardly looked inconvenienced. "Aw, you saw that?" he asked lightheartedly and chuckled, trying desperately to alleviate the toxic atmosphere. "That's a little embarrassing, but it's alright! No bad blood. Right Bakugo?"  
  
The blonde only kept staring.  
  
"........Bakugo?"   
  
\--  
A couple weeks earlier.  
  
Midoriya couldn't put his finger on what was wrong with Bakugo. He was troubled by his changing behavior, but of course he couldn't ask. He noticed that he was getting up later (which forced HIM to wake up later so that they didn't risk bumping into each other) and that he was on his phone a lot more than usual, as if he was talking to someone. Frequently. Both via text and calls.  _Maybe that mystery girlfriend does exist after all,_  he considered, but it was just so... unnatural to think of Bakugo in a romantic setting. Him kissing someone or holding hands without wanting to tear them limb from limb. _What would Kacchan's standards for a partner even consist of?_  He didn't accept that anyone was better than him, and he didn't tolerate anyone who was weaker than him. And he thought everyone was weaker than him, so... it was quite the predicament.   
  
Unless he were to be on equal grounds with someone, but he couldn't imagine Bakugo actually stepping down and saying, "You know what, we're on the same level. AND we should fuck."  
  
He turned red just thinking about that and smacked his hand over his face.  _GAH! Kacchan would say something like that, wouldn't he? But he's not that type of guy! At least I hope not..._  
  
He decided he should probably just hurry up the stairs to class. On his way up, he heard something clack onto the floor and down the stairs. He blinked and slowly peeked over the side of the stairs. _A phone?_  Then he followed where the phone might've come from, and low and behold. Kirishima holding Bakugo's hands and kissing him.   
  
...What.   
  
 _WHAT?!_  
  
He ducked back and zipped back down the stairs as quietly as he could.  _WHAT DID I JUST WITNESS?! WAS THAT REAL!?_  his mind screamed as he tried to calm the heat in his face. He gasped after passing some of his classmates on the way down, and he immediately yowled,"C-COME BACK! WAIT!"  
  
It was the usual gang: Denki, Sero, and Mineta. They all gave him a strange look and stopped. "What's wrong? Are you okay?? You look like a tomato," Sero teased and pointed to his face. "HA! You're so right! His hair looks like the leaves!" Denki snickered and ruffled the boy's green locks. The three burst out laughing, and it didn't help that Midoriya was getting more pink, but honestly, he'd do anything to prevent them from going up the stairs and seeing their friends making out right now. When more people showed up, he made sure to drag them into the conversation gathering at the bottom of the stairs. Once it was crowded enough and everyone was having a good time, he slipped out of the crowd and made sure the uh... couple was gone.  
  
He sighed relief when they were, and it was that point he began to question if what he saw had really been real. If not, what a WEIRD hallucination to have... why would he ever think of that willingly? But why would Bakugo ever let anyone kiss him willingly? It was a whole new side of him he couldn't begin to wrap his head around.  
  
Little did he know, weeks later when he would volunteer at a bowling alley to gain arm strength by helping with putting away bowling balls, he would have no choice but to wrap his head around it.  
  
\--  
  
"S-So, yeah... I made sure no one else came up the stairs because I-I didn't think you'd want anyone to see you that way... if you were already kissing, that meant your relationship had been going on for a while, s-so I figured you were keeping it secret..." Midoriya murmured apologetically and glanced into Bakugo's shadowed eyes.  
  
There was silence for a moment. In the background, Kirishima gave Deku a grateful thumbs up. He couldn't begin to imagine what horrors would have ensued if they had been found out before they were ready.  
  
But Bakugo wasn't so grateful.  
  
"Do you want me to  _thank_ you, Deku?" he asked thinly and rubbed his thumb against his throat. It wasn't an assuring rub of any kind, as Midoriya knew he was just trying to get his weird nitroglycerin sweat on him so that it would be easier to explode his skull off.  
  
"W-What?! No, I--"  
  
"Then why did you do it? Did you think I might not be able to handle it? The reveal? You think I'm a fucking toddler, Deku? Always coming to the rescue... is that what you think?"  
  
"Bakugo, don't be ridiculous! I know you can handle yourself!"  
  
"Then why'd you do it? Huh?!" His grip became deadly, and Midoriya had enough before it even began. He charged power into his hand, and pushed Bakugo with enough force to at least send him back into a surprised Kirishima without sending either of them to the ground. He coughed and wiped his brow of the drops of terror that were starting to accumulate before bringing himself back up with a purely bitter glare.  
  
"I was just trying to help, idiot!" he snapped and harshly stomped his foot on the concrete. "That's what it means to be a hero! Even if it's just me keeping others from seeing you and your boyfriend kiss...! I knew you wouldn't like them knowing, so I acted like a hero--or  _any_ good person--would! Why do you always have to take it to these extremes?! You're delusional, Kacchan!  _Delusional!_ "  
  
This silence felt a lot more like cheese graters fighting a chalkboard.   
  
Kirishima gulped and tried to keep a hold on Bakugo, but he had already shrugged him off and stepped forward.  
  
Then he laughed.   
  
He started to laugh, completely unhinged and hysterical. Deku looked sickly unsettled and it took all his might not to ask what the hell was wrong with him. He didn't see this as such a big deal; so what if they were dating? It made sense when one thought about it. He glanced to Kirishima for help, but the redhead looked equally unnerved by his boyfriend's behavior.  
  
Bakugo just kept cackling freely, but he was clenching his fists with the grip of a python. "Dude," Kirishima whispered, his face wracked with concern. "Dude, shut  _up_ , are you okay?"  
  
"I-I... I just..." he snickered and used his hand to wipe his eyes of a few comedic tears. "Oh man, I never thought the day I  _actually_ murdered Deku would come this soon! Like, I'm ACTUALLY going to KILL him. I thought I wanted to kill you before, but FUCK, I am feeling  _super_ homicidal right now."  
  
"Please don't do that," Kiri said desperately and strayed closer. "You'll get kicked out of school, and then you'd have to explain why. And I would also have to explain that I'm your boyfriend and such. I can cover for the class, but I can't cover for the authorities, Bakugo. Let's just go."   
  
Bakugo considered what he had said and sighed in resignation, but he wasn't ready to let Deku off the hook quite yet. "Fine. I won't  _kill_ him." Deku was actually pretty surprised Kiri's words had worked so easily. "But I'm gonna fuck him up to make sure he doesn't tell." Oh. Nevermind.  
  
"Bakugo," Kirishima strained tiredly. He never understood these two. Such hate between two people could surely be talked over, or you could come to some kind of truce or agreement. "If you beat him up, people will ask questions."   
  
"They won't, since the asswipe already has his Quirk fucking him up all the time."  
  
"Bakugo, I'm not gonna stand here and watch you beat up Midoriya. He didn't do anything."  
  
Out of pure spite, Bakugo punched Deku as hard as he could in the gut before throwing him down. "What the hell is wrong with you?!" Kirishima hissed and shoved him. His boyfriend's eyes flashed with betrayal at his behavior.  
  
"Kirishima, I don't think you understand how... how EVERYTHING I am right now.  _I_  don't even understand, and that definitely means  _you_ don't."  
  
"Whether or not anyone understands doesn't give you permission to harm Midoriya!! You better apologize!"   
  
"Apolo-fuckin-WHAT?! Fuck no!"   
  
"Be a fucking man, Bakugo! Apologize!"  
  
Katsuki flinched, and the enmity in his face became melted with regret. He had made Kirishima upset. Of course he had. The redhead looked completely disgusted with his course of action, and he went over to help Deku up.  _Fucking Deku._ Scorching hostility stampeded through Bakugo's entire body.   
  
That little rat Deku always had everyone cheering him on and praising him for something he wasn't. He stole his dream of being the only one in their school to ever go to UA, and had the gall to stand up to him and even speak of surpassing him. As if  _Deku_ was trying as hard as him to be perfect! He couldn't be! And somehow, here he was, making his boyfriend defend him and even look at him with such revulsion...! Hadn't he taken enough from him?! That rancid, vegetable haired  _parasite_ walked around with that stupid smile as though he were completely unaware of what he was doing! And he would say "You're so amazing Kacchan," even now! Yet he belittled him by saving him and lending a helping hand as if he  _needed_ it, as if he needed  _help_ , much less  _Deku's_. As if he was incapable of helping himself, as if he wasn't _good enough_ , as if Midoriya himself was  _so_ much better than him.  
  
Bakugo couldn't let him know it was bothering him though. Or that it bothered him daily. He couldn't show a shred of weakness, not even an indication of defeat or fear that Deku could one day possibly beat him at anything. Just the thought was breaking his worldview down too much for comfort. He clutched his tanktop, the one that said "Probably Better Than You." Was it true? Was he better than Deku? He hated how now he was so unsure even though it was so  _clear_ in middle school. How was the script of time rewritten so quickly? What snobby cosmic forces hated him so much as to bring this upon him? He was starting to hyperventilate. Their first week of training at UA, Deku had already beat him. Hearing that leech's name shouted by All Might over the intercom:   
  
 _"Midoriya and Uraraka win!!"_  
  
And now that same leech knew their secret.  
  
And probably already told others about it, even if he said otherwise.  
  
He wanted to scream.  
  
So he did.   
  
  
  
 ** _"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"_**  he screeched into this universe that just wanted nothing but for him to suffer, for him to live not even a single day in peace, for him to be reminded constantly every goddamn day that he was so goddamn weak and nothing would come out of his hard work. Nothing. Nothing at all. His life felt like trying to sculpt a mountain with a plastic spoon on the verge of breaking. He wasn't getting anywhere. And Deku kept kicking the spoon out of his hand.  
  
"Bakugo!  _Bakugo!"_  
  
Someone was shaking him, but he was just so stuffed to the brim with myriad emotions that he couldn't respond. He felt nausea and delirium bubble to the surface of his body. Everything was spinning and he truly just wanted to die, even if only for a moment. He wanted it to end. He didn't catch that after his cry he had continued hyperventilating, and tears were stinging at his eyes. He vaguely felt gentle hands face his head up and what might've been a short kiss.   
  
"Bakugo,  _please_ , you're really worrying me...! Calm down, I-I'm begging you..."   
  
A hand rubbed warm circles around his back to take him down at least a couple notches. It gradually worked, and he was left with a quivering body still loaded with emotions, albeit worn out ones.  _Am I about to cry? Am I already crying?_  He didn't feel like he was crying. The tears were just falling on their own. In front of Deku. Honestly, he didn't even feel anything thinking about that. Deku had seen him cry once before anyway. As always, Deku just felt the need to expose every part of him and his emotions, didn't he? Whatever. It didn't matter. He felt devoid of any feeling for the first time in a while, and frankly, it was a little satisfying.  _That was a well needed breakdown,_  he decided, but it's not like he would be thanking Midoriya later.  
  
"K-Kiri..." he whispered breathlessly and sank to his knees. Everything felt too light for comfort. "Kiri, I-I'm dying..."   
  
"No the fuck you aren't," Kirishima growled and knelt in front of him. His hands clapped onto Bakugo's face so that they were staring eye to eye. "Bakugo, listen to me. You are alive. You will live. I won't let anything bad befall you, even if you feel like the world is crashing down, okay? This isn't the end just because Midoriya knows. It wouldn't be the end if everyone in class knew, or even if everyone in the world knew, okay? I know these things are harder on you than me, and that just might be because I have tougher skin, but..." He smirked as optimistically as he could. "Get it? Tough skin?" Bakugo sniffed and didn't say anything. "Come ooon, that was funny." Midoriya bit his his lip and dusted himself off.  
  
"Can I go now?" he asked in a drained voice. This wasn't how he'd wanted his volunteer night to go. Kirishima nodded while Bakugo didn't even look at him. Midoriya sighed and briskly walked off without a glance back or an apology. He knew Bakugo wouldn't want it. He didn't want  _anything_ from him.  
  
"Kirishima, I can't feel," Katsuki murmured and allowed his boyfriend to hold his hands and scoot closer to him on the concrete. He didn't care who saw anymore. He just didn't.   
  
"Can you feel my hands?" Kirishima asked tenderly and rubbed his thumbs along his fingers. They were certainly warm... So the boy nodded.   
  
"I guess..."   
  
"That's all you need to feel right now. Focus on that."  
  
They sat there quietly as Bakugo collected all the broken pieces of his psyche together. Kirishima silently coaxed him along with his presence and gave him a small kiss on the cheek every now and then. He made sure to sprinkle a "everything is okay" every once in a while as well. Though he didn't completely forgive Bakugo, he did realize there was even more deep down in him than he could imagine. Some core of unmovable insecurity and self loathing that had fossilized within him, all mixed with a tendency to lash out on others and a desperate need to perfect himself. But even summarizing it so simply felt wrong. While he did love Bakugo with all his heart, he wondered if Bakugo was in the right head for a relationship. He wondered if he was stable enough, and if it had been a bad idea to confess so soon when their lives were already changing so much from being in UA. But Bakugo needed that step forward. He needed someone to help him along these new changes instead of forcing him. And goddammit, Kirishima wanted to be that person.  
  
"I'm sorry. I ruined our date," Bakugo murmured and let Kirishima press their foreheads together. He didn't mind feeling his hands run through his hair either.   
  
"It's okay, baby," Kiri promised and smiled gently. "You didn't ruin it. I learned more about you, through those trivia questions and...this."  
  
"Like what?" He didn't actually sound like he cared.  
  
"I learned I have a lot of work to do if I want to make you feel like the best boyfriend ever, and I'll willingly go to whatever lengths it takes."  
  
"Why haven't you broken up with me?"  
  
Kirishima didn't like the way he said it like the breakup was overdue, like he was  _supposed_ to have broken up with him by now. He pulled back and  placed his hands on Bakugo's shoulders. "I'll be real with you Bakugo. I don't like the thought of you being angry all by yourself without me to kiss you," he admitted and poked his cheek. "Your adorableness would be wasted."  
  
Bakugo didn't say anything and only sighed. It broke Kirishima's heart to see him like this, truly. The entire breakdown pressed on him, the breakdown in which he didn't do anything and didn't take the whole situation seriously enough because he had underestimated Bakugo's feelings. Were there earlier signs? Something he could've done to prevent this? He wished he could go back in time and shut his stupid ass up for making that joke about his Quirk.  _He_ should be sorry, not Bakugo. And he had to apologize to Deku too for even suggesting going outside in the first place. He wondered what he could have done, what he  _should_ have done in order to make this situation turn out better. But he couldn't do anything. At least he could look forward to finding better ways to be a less incompetent hero at camp. Even though he wasn't helping anybody right now, he had to try. His hands were starting to shake at the feel of everything coming down, but he had to sit up straight through it all.  
  
"B-Bakugo..." Kirishima felt him lift his lifeless eyes to him. "I..." Words were failing him. What could he say? It would take more than a kiss and some hugs to put the passion back into Bakugo. "...I... I'll admit it, I don't know how to help you right now. If I did, I would go to any extent to achieve it. I love you. Truly. If there's anything you need, please just let me know. Anything to help you at all as long as it doesn't involve breaking up with you. I want you to be happy. I want you to smile and to laugh, not to suffer from all those pent up emotions. You don't understand them, and you were right when you said I didn't either. But if there's anything I can do to alleviate the pain, let me know anytime. Okay?" He sniffed and wiped his eyes with the collar of his black shirt. "'Cause I need you, you know... even if you feel like everyone is against you,  _I'm_  not, and I'm always cheering you on, o-okay?..."  
  
Bakugo meekly watched his boyfriend begin to sob. "I-I just w-w-want to help you and make you s-so happy and smile so wide t-that people think that your f-face is broken...!" He sniffled and wrapped threw arms around his explosive partner. "D-dammit, K-Katsuki...!"  
  
He appreciated the hug. He appreciated Eijirou in general. He didn't know if he was dropped on the head as a baby and that's why the redhead was attracted to him, because he certainly didn't deserve his love. But he had it. If the universe has truly against him, Bakugo had the cutest boyfriend to hold up as a shield and scream, "FUCK YOU, I HAVE THE POWER OF FUCKING LOVE!"   
  
He had Eijirou.   
  
That was a truth.  
  
He could worry about whether or not Deku was stronger than him or if he would be the number one hero or wonder if he was good enough all day, but it was a solid, indisputable fact that Kirishima was his. And he would relish in it for as long as they were together. He would relish this, the fact that they were hugging on the dirtyass sidewalk behind a bowling alley under the dying light of some cheap lampost forever. He would relish all the time they had spent together and look forward to all the times ahead, whether they be at school, at camp, or underground, dammit.  
  
He loved him.  
  
So he decided then that he would never let anything tear them apart, no matter how much he had earned it. 


	8. Second First Times

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh, this chapter gets a little homosexier than usual. Some talk about jerkin the sausage. But no actual sausage  
> jerkin, sorry kids.
> 
> Takes place after chapter 2: The Talk!
> 
> Chapter 9 coming soon~

After Kirishima almost broke up with him, Bakugo laid it down a week or so later while they were under their spot at the bleachers.  
  
"Listen, porcupine. Our dates were.... pretty bad."  
  
Kirishima immediately agreed with a nod and a mildly annoyed look. He had forgiven him, but if he had to guess what dating a cardboard cutout of denial felt like, he imagined it wouldn't be much different than Bakugo. He could recall many horrendous trips to places gone wrong, but a select few remained the best worst dates he'd ever been on.  
  
Once, they had gone to a petting zoo so that Bakugo would hopefully loosen up. And surely if he could stand being nuzzled by a llama, he could stand being nuzzled by his partner. (This--unsurprisingly--wasn't true and Bakugo kept walking ahead whenever they stopped or "talked for too long.") They were in a greenhouse-esque building of colorful birds zipping in and out of velvety flowers and trees all around, and at some point, a lovebird had descended onto Bakugo's shoulder. Kirishima squealed and immediately stopped his boyfriend in his tracks so he could take a picture. The poor boy looked deeply disturbed that this avian fuck had dared to settle onto his shoulder, so Kirishima was quick to bring the camera up on his phone. Despite not being in the picture, he was smiling like an idiot and purred, "I'm so jealous of that bird right now! All snuggled into your shoulder and what not. So cute."  
  
It all happened pretty quick. Bakugo let out a tortured squeal Kirishima honest to god thought was from another bird and  _punched the fluffball off his shoulder_. The bird bravely fell and let out a battle cry that had some of its vengeful feathered pals come down and endlessly peck and pummel his boyfriend [who was now on the ground shouting curses and doing his very best not to turn the entire sanctuary into a Chick-fil-a.] Kirishima frowned at the picture that came out like a cryptic blur similar to those in "Photos Taken Before Death" articles and wondered if he should stop the assault made in the name of well deserved bird justice. He decided to, but made sure to get a good punch in for the unfortunate (but luckily still alive and well) parrot who landed on the wrong shoulder.   
  
Bakugo refused to talk to him for the rest of the date, yippee.  
  
Another date was when they went to a seafood restaurant to try some exotic fishes. Once their meals had been served, Kirishima started quizzing Bakugo with all kinds of things to try and pry for some kind of deeper personality trait that wasn't grumpy.  
  
"You like video games?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"What's your fave?"  
  
"I don't know."  
  
"Well... do you have a favorite console?"  
  
"Not really."  
  
"Favorite sport?"  
  
"Dodgeball."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"I can kill everyone."   
  
"Ah, not sure why I asked..."  
  
"Yep."  
  
Silence.  
  
Kirishima coughed and decided to maybe have some fun. He cut a piece of his fish and lifted it on his fork. He held it out to Katsuki and grinned. "Open wiiiiiide!" he teased and thrust it forward. If that fork had been a person, it would have no skin because of how hard it was slapped into the infinite void of space. The deadpan stare of tranquil anger Bakugo wore was a little too much for Kirishima who laughed nervously and hid behind his menu. That just about concluded their conversation for that evening...  
  
Now, the most memorable date they had was at the movies. They went to watch some sci-fi aliens-abducting-humans dystopia movie that was really big at the time, so they gotten there early and snatched the best seats. Except Bakugo was sitting three seats away from Kirishima.   
  
"Dude, get over here!" he complained and patted the seat next to him.   
  
Bakugo bit his lip and clearly hesitated which was new to Kiri, but he came over nonetheless. He wondered what was wrong with him sometimes. Why wouldn't he want to be around him? Did he do something wrong? And wasn't Baku the one who approached him after rejecting him? HE wanted to do this. Surely he knew sitting next to your partner was the bare minimum in the job description of being a boyfriend. He would ask, but... that might make it worse. He wanted to hold onto Bakugo for as long as he could for now, even if it kinda hurt...  
  
They didn't talk much after that. Seats were soon filled to the brim and the movie started. The room went dark, the blue light of the screen bathed them all in an attentive silence as they remained rigid and intrigued by the visuals of monsters ripping each other apart and humans running for their lives played before them. Kirishima was enjoying himself, but... he couldn't stop glancing at Bakugo.  
  
The exploderizer was watching the movie with a very thoughtful stare, and a notable twitch of the eyebrows whenever someone screamed. His hands clenched tightly every time an alien ate or attacked someone who was running away. He looked pained, actually, and Kirishima could understand why. This wasn't too far from anything that could happen in real life. Imagining if what happened at USJ had happened in the city... with all the criminals, and even the Nomu... this movie might be what it looked like. And the reality shown here was not everyone was going to get saved. He could only assume his partner was imagining what would happen if all these people slipped through his finger tips, or what he'd do if he had successfully torn someone away from evil only for them to die in his arms... or even worse, if he hadn't been successful at all...  
  
He had gently tapped Bakugo's arm to get his attention. The boy slowly looked to him, his face twisted with grief. "It's okay," Kirishima whispered and leaned in for their first kiss.  
  
People had to be evacuated from the massive explosion he caused, and god DAMN was Kiri thankful for his reflexes because if he hadn't hardened less than half a second sooner, he could only imagine how far his head would have flown off his body. After everyone rushed out of the cinema and all that was left were the two boys, he witnessed Bakugo probably the most furious he had ever seen him.   
  
"Don't. Ever. Fucking. Do that. Again," he spat venomously and balled his hands into tight fists. Kiri wondered if he was refraining from kicking his ass right now since the blonde seemed strangely troubled. He appeared anguished by his actions and sighed in what was possibly defeat. The sound of monsters in the movie looming over their sobbing prey was the only noise filling the room aside from the crackling of some burning seats.   
  
"Sorry," he muttered before just...leaving.   
  
Kirishima hadn't known how to feel about that. It hurt a lot, but he covered it up with the idea that it was his fault for catching him by surprise and breaking their "no gay shit" rule. He put a bunch of people in danger just because he wanted to steal a kiss from his boyfriend. But... it was then that he realized if showing love to his significant other actually posed as a danger to others and himself, then... this might not work out. It wasn't he was getting any love back anyway.  
  
But right now, Bakugo said otherwise.  
  
"I want to redo those dates. Okay? Redo them all. Or a couple. Some. We're definitely redoing the movies if we're allowed back in," he declared and clapped his hands together conclusively. "We are going to have the biggest fuckin' super date day EVER."  
  
"Are you sure you can handle that?" Kirishima asked and took a bite out of his meaty lunch.  
  
"Absolutely not."  
  
"Then why'd you suggest it?"  
  
"I-I just wanted to do something that would make you...." He was blushing and let his eyes take interest in some really nice looking dirt particles on the ground. "Y'know...feel better after me being such an a--"  
  
"AWWW!!"   
  
Bakugo wheezed when he was yanked into a manly man hug and had his hair ruffled mercilessly. "Bakugo, you're so nice! I had no idea! But I want you to have fun, and more importantly, stay alive, so we'll have to save that mega date day for later."  
  
"Ugghhh. Fine. Well...." He shifted in Kirishima's hold awkwardly. "Ummm... I guess we can just to your place..."  
  
"Yeah! We can snuggle there."  
  
He coughed. "Fucking what?"  
  
"Bakugo, if you want to stay my boyfriend, kissing is a necessity you know. I--"  
  
Bakugo shoved him off and snatched him by the collar, fiercely peering into Kiri's face. "What? You think I can't take a fuckin' cuddle? I know I can! I-I just... couldn't before for some reason! I-It was gay, but, now it's not gay! Or not AS gay, I--I just--FUCK!" He shook him as though he was talking smack. "GAH! When we get to your house, I tell you what. We're going to have the most badass snuggles no matter what, no chickening out, NONE. ZILCH. ZERO. I'm gonna... I'll take it like a man!" He nodded to himself proudly. "Yeah! I'll...do that............."  
  
Kiri looked somewhat doubtful, but was glad he had something to use against the stubborn mule in the case he denied having a cuddly time. "Well, alrighty then. I'll hold you to it, bro," he chuckled and patted Bakugo's arm. The way he shivered was hilarious.  
  
"Don't ever call me bro when we're talking about romantic stuff again," he croaked rigidly and dropped the redhead. "Just know I'll be the best cuddler you've ever cuddled."  
  
\--  
  
Home alone.  
  
And thus the time came. Kirishima (with hair down and ready to roll) fondly remembered their first attempt of snuggling which lead to some bed sheets turning into ashes, but the rest of his room was still in tact, so he was fine. Posters of Crimson Riot and inspirational messages took up the walls, and shelves where only the manliest books, video games, and movies earned their place. His bed was definitely big enough for both of them, and Kiri was excited to see just how well they fit together on it. Otherwise, there was his computer desk area with a bunch of sticky notes of reminders and a calendar that looked like he had written an essay on it. [He was a busy guy, okay? Lots of workouts...] He didn't have a TV in his room since he usually played games downstairs. Plus, the stand where a TV would be had lifting weights on it instead.   
  
For now, Kirishima walked along the lining of nice wooden flooring surrounding the large black and red rug on the ground. Bakugo was pep talking himself in Kiri's office chair, repeatedly facepalming and groaning before continuing on with whatever he was mumbling about. He couldn't help but sigh, really-- the goal of this date was ultimately to become comfy cuddle buddies... He knew Katsuki was as reserved as a diary with ten locks, a retina scan, and a rubix cube code. He wasn't confident in him suddenly  letting all the touching happen, or--  
  
Bakugo suddenly slammed his fist on the table and whirled around to Kiri.  
  
"Kirishima, I don't fucking know how to do this," he said flat out, no shame, no nothing. Nothing except an oddly apologetic look. "I want to make you happy, Kiri, but... I don't know. I've never been.... touched before."  
  
"I mean, I can name a few occasions where I tried to, but I can try again," Kiri grumbled with a twinge of salt and stopped in his tracks. He held out his hands and did a grabby motion. "Come 'ere, baby."  
  
Bakugo dragged his pink self over to him and sighed. "What." "Give me your hands." He raised his explosive weapons--er, hands--and flinched when the redhead held them. But it was a gentle hold accompanied by a soft smile that made his mind whirl. It was just handholding, really, but... there was something so powerful surging between them that he couldn't understand. Just the connection was enough to make him want to spend the rest of his life with this beautiful-  
  
"FUCK!" he exclaimed and let go of his hands. "Fuckity FUCK fuck...! FUCKWAFFLE!"   
  
"Dude, what's wrong??" Kiri asked, unsure if he should be afraid or laugh.   
  
"I think...." His face was blooming like a red rose. "I...I think I'm gay..."  
  
Silence.  
  
Kirishima didn't stop laughing. He didn't stop laughing for a while, and needed his boyfriend to shake him back to sanity before he pierced a lung with a rib from how he had hunched over and started wheezing.   
  
"The fuck is wrong with you?! It's not funny!!"  
  
"Bakugo, I-I.... oh MAN..." He cackled some more and rubbed his face. "Man, I... I don't have any words...n-nevermind, let's...let's just get on with it...."  
  
Once they mastered the art of handholding, it was time to take it up a level. Kirishima embraced Bakugo tightly and took in a deep breath of him while he could before the explosions started happening. But luckily, they never came. It took a couple of moments for Bakugo to hug back, and it was then Kiri wondered what was on his mind, but.... He never knew, no matter how much he wanted to.  
  
_But I'll know today. I swear it._  
  
"Can we stop hugging now?" Katsuki pleaded with a rather quivery voice. Kiri blinked and pulled back.  
  
"What's wrong?"  
  
"It's...so weird....."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Dude! I-I... our _dicks...._ they're touching 'n...shit.... _"_  
  
Of all the things Kirishima expected him to say, that definitely wasn't on the list. While it was obvious when two men hugged they might have some... loin-to-loin contact, but he was shocked Bakugo focused on that. Or rather... he was curious  _why_ he was focused on that.  _Is that what he wants? I don't think we can get to that level at the pace we're going._  
  
_God I hope we never get to that level,_  Bakugo thought for only a split second. He'd done his research before hand--plenty of it. Now, he wasn't confirmed gay or anything, but watching those videos put a... VERY peculiar feeling in his  ~~pants~~  chest. Ever since watching them, he wondered if there would be a day Kirishima slid into his room in the middle of he night and seduced him into some, ah... illicit activities. He hated that he had been honest to god wondering who would be the top and the bottom. And godDAMN he hated that urge the videos gave him, that feeling of being hungry for skin and friction... he hoped he would never get it around Kiri. What would he do?  
  
_I hope he completely takes over me._  
  
"FUCKING HELL CAN WE MOVE ON?!" Bakugo squawked and stomped his foot. "Kiri, let's get to the--the MOUTH shit! The um, you know, I..." He was flustering himself into a corner and let his gaze look anywhere but the increasingly handsome but totally puzzled Kirishima before him.  _Oh wow. Was he always this pretty? Having that talk made me realize a lot of things._  
  
He squeaked when his hands were taken and a kiss was pressed into his cheek. Ohhh, those warm chills rang through him like never before. He wanted one on the mouth right away, but couldn't bring himself to say it. All that came out was a cracked "Nnnoww aaAa...gghmmm."   
  
"What?? Bakugo, if you want something, you're going to have to speak a language I understand," Kirishima sighed and kissed his other cheek. "Did you like that? Are you comfortable-? Oh my." He wondered if Bakugo knew how aroused he looked right now. He was biting his lip and stared into his eyes with intense intimacy. It was honestly making him blush and forced him to turn away.  _Holy shit, Katsuki. Tone it down. It was just cheek kisses._  
  
Bakugo cleared his throat and asserted,"It was okay. Y-Yeah. Um." He glanced down to Kirishima's lips. His soft, always smiling, supple lips. He didn't know why he was so attracted to them, to HIM. HE. MALE.  _Okay, now I REALLY think I might be gay...._  he thought, but he wasn't really worried anymore, because damn it just felt so good to have Kiri so close to him.  _Just kiss me already.  
  
_ Kirishima leaned in... and booped their noses together. He giggled at the not-so-subtly pissed reaction he got and skipped on over to the bed. "Come on! We're getting horizontal."  
  
"Don't ever say that again," Bakugo choked but came over nonetheless. He hoped he didn't come off as too eager. _Gosh, I've been missing a LOT. I didn't know it felt nice...I wonder how far we'll go.... I-I mean, I guess I knew it felt nice, I just didn't want to admit it... I don't wanna be Kirishima's bitch, dammit..._  He sat at the edge of the bed and glanced to his patiently waiting lover that was sitting criss cross.  _Okay, I need to calm down._  
  
He crawled onto the bed and sat in front of Kirishima. "............So............do we, um....what...."   
  
"Do you want to be the big spoon or the little spoon?"   
  
_"WHAT."_  
  
"We're just going to do everything couple-y I can think of so you can know what to expect in the future. I promise we can play video games afterwards."   
  
"....Fine..."  
  
He squeaked when he was yanked down onto the bed and felt the heat of Kirishima curl around him. His arms weaseled around him and held him in a loving trap of fuzzy appreciation. There were no words he could say that could describe how much he loved this. Kiri's cute giggles in his ear as  he buried his face into his shoulders and gently rubbed circles into his chest. The pure comfort that bubbled in him was unmatched by anything else he had ever experienced, and he really wanted to show that to Kiri in some way.  _Here goes._  
  
Bakugo rolled around so they were facing each other now, making Kirishima confused for a moment. "What-?" He was cut off by another pair of lips. They both practically melted into, with Kirishima clutching his boyfriend's shirt and Bakugo pulling him closer by the waist. Honestly, his body had just moved on its own (as it did with most heroes.) He felt more passion adding coal to his needy fire and found himself kissing him over and over and over. He just couldn't stop. He wanted him, and he had wanted him this whole time, but because of his stupid walls he wasn't able to show it. Now he wanted to explode all those walls to dust and show Kirishima everything he kept on the inside.  
  
That was until Kirishima clapped his hand over his mouth and shoved his face back a little. But he'd be damned if he had never seen the redhead look so pampered and tingly with giddiness.   
  
"M-My goodness, Bakugo, um...!" he squeaked. Usually it was Bakugo who was the bewildered one, but it seems they had traded places for now. "I-I... wow, um... didn't expect that! Give me some time to breathe, baby..."  
  
Bakugo nodded in understanding and cutely settled his head into Eijirou's chest as he waited.  _His heartbeat..._  A gentle pattering in his chest that had quickly accelerated against his cheek. He never wanted to separate, frankly. From the start, he didn't want to separate, he just never knew how to approach his desires. But since they were  _really_ alone, he felt a lot free-er and was assured it was okay to have these wants to be with his boyfriend. It was fine. He could be with him.   
  
"That's our first kiss," Bakugo murmured and felt the embarrassment start to seep into him. "Oh man, that's our first kiss...!"  
  
"Second kiss," Kirishima corrected, sounding a bit stuffed because he was still very stunned by how many pecks his face had received. "Remember when you almost blew up my face?"  
  
"F-Forget that," Bakugo stammered quickly. "THIS Is our first kiss. Our second first kiss. Way better. Okay?"  
  
"...Okay." Kiri felt bliss tug his lips into a smile and pulled Bakugo up to kiss him again. Though the boy shrank back at first, he accepted it and even pushed into it. He shifted so that  ~~their crotches weren't rubbing~~  he was more comfortable and felt around for the redhead's hands. At least until he felt something truly mortifying.  
  
A tongue.  
  
In his mouth.  
  
He reeled back as a barbarian animal noise scraped out of his throat.  **"DUDE WHAT THE _FUCK?!"_**  He sat up all the way and nearly fell off the bed as he tried to clean his mouth in a frenzy of wipes. "WHAT THE FUCKERY FUCKING FUCK HELL SHIT ASS TITTYWAFFLE CAT-FINGERING ANAL CAVITY--" Kirishima slapped his hands on both of his cheeks and yanked him forward.  
  
"Bro! Chill!"  
  
"DON'T CALL ME 'BRO' AFTER YOU JUST TRIED TO FRENCH KISS ME!!"  
  
"Okay, fine, but why are you overreacting?"  
  
"I-I-I, I'm not OVERreacting, I-- I just-- your tongue, y-your...!"  
  
_Delicious, moist, somewhat salty tongue._  
  
He let out another tortured wail and shoved Kirishima's hands off of him.  _"FUUUUUUUUUUCK!"_  
  
He crawled forward and snatched redfuck by the shirt, and it was at this point Kiri feared that his shirts might not survive this relationship. "Dammit Kirishima, I'm not a coward, fucking tongue me all you want, I can take it! I CAN TAKE IT, I SWEAR!" His total mood change was accompanied by a slightly shaken voice yet also a decisive gaze. Kiri looked a little less than convinced.  
  
"Um..." He brushed a thumb across Bakugo's cheek. "I don't want to make you uncomfortable, baby-"  
  
"KIRISHIMA! Please don't make me say I really fuckin' like it. Please don't."  
  
Kirishima decided not to bring up that he just admitted he enjoyed it, but nodded and fingered through his hair. "And then what?"  
  
"Let's just go hard." He hastily held up his free hand. "N-N-NOT LIKE DICK HARD! BUT LIKE, CUDDLE-HARD! M-M-Make...making....um..."  
  
"It's fine, I know what you mean," he laughed and... had an enticing look in his eyes. "Safe word is Chinchilla."  
  
"Why Ch-"  
  
Kirishima threw himself forward and onto Bakugo without any warning. The fireboy rasped from all the weight on him released the cloth he had in his hand. In fact, both of his hands were pinned down and had fingers intertwined into them. Kiri's bold demeanor was getting him incredibly excited, and he felt his own stupid face forming into a stupid grin. Just looking at his boyfriend's hungry eyes, his gleaming teeth, his tongue sliding over his lips, his little nose twitch and crimson hair falling over his face...   
  
_Take me away._  
  
Kiri leaned down and thrust his face into Bakugo's. Their lips locked and Bakugo felt a visitor slide against his teeth and tongue. Oh, nothing could describe the yearning in his core go off like fireworks leaving behind trailing sparks of fondness. He squeezed Kiri's hands and allowed him to skim through his mouth with the occasional wrestle with his own tongue. He had to refrain from cursing blissfully so that his lips didn't get in the way. He could've sworn he felt Kiri rub their crotches together slightly since he was sitting on his waist, but... he didn't mind.   
  
Bakugo whined in frustration when Eijirou pulled away, but shut right up when his lips were cleaned in large dragging licks that made his breathing stop. Feeling steamy breath on his face was not doing his dick any favors.   
  
"Was that good?"   
  
It took a moment to register that Kiri had asked him something. "Why are you stopping?" he scoffed sharply. When Kiri gave a slight hump, he gave a very different answer. "AH, CH-CHINCHILLA! N-n-no, we're not doing that gay shit! Just... other gay shit! Okay?!"  
  
"Even when we're making out you're so loud. It's perfect," Kirishima chuckled and traced circles beneath Bakugo's shirt that were making him a little hotter than he wanted. "Can I take your shirt off?" He smiled politely, totally making him befuddled.  
  
"Why do you have to treat making out like a friendly activity?" he pouted and shyly pulled his shirt off. He bit his lip feeling Kirishima's hands immediately explore the grooves of his chest. Though he'd be lying if he said he wasn't proud; it took a lot more than the treadmill to get his body to the way it was today.  
  
"Daaaayum, Katsuki, you're so fine," the redhead complimented earnestly and patted his chest. "Really nice!"  
  
"See?! You always have that 'buddy old pal' attitude, even when I'm stripping for you! GAH!"  
  
"Well, I thought you'd think it was less gay."  
  
"N-Not really, it's..." Bakugo glanced up at the puppy faced Kirishima. "....Just take your shirt off too."  
  
Goodness, when Kirishima pulled his shirt off it was like a Christmas present opening itself. Those rocking abs, the sculpted edges of his masculine figure... he  couldn't wait for him to lean over him once more and continue with their dirty deeds. Red's oblivious doofy smile was kinda hot given he acted like he knew what he was doing. It was then that really unnecessary fear descended upon him.  
  
_Wait a fuckin' minute. Am I his first boyfriend? Second? AM I REALLY BAD AT THIS? Holy shit, I've gotta step up my game. I think?? I think this is a really bad time to ask if he's dated anyone else. Oh, no, who's seen him like this before? I hope it's only me. But he seems to have practice... maybe a one night fling? WHY THE FUCK AM I SAYING THAT, KIRI DOESN'T HAVE THAT KIND OF MONEY... Wait, why am I assuming he got experience via prostitution? HE'S NOT THAT KIND OF GUY, CALM DOWN, AAAA-_  
  
Bakugo's mind shut down when Kirishima kissed his jawline, and gradually went lower. His heart was clawing to get out of his chest like a beast and his breathing hitched at every touch. His hand snaked over Kiri's back and savored every single muscle before reaching his hair. He gently grabbed onto it, making Kiri stop for a moment and glance up at him mischievously before going back to kissing his neck. Then he  _bit_ his neck in what was a welcoming little suckling pain of sorts that made him clamp a fistful of red hair and gasp a bit more lewdly than he wanted.  
  
"Kirishima, don't ever tell  _anyone_ I just made that noise--" He started, but was cut off by another succulent love bite. He couldn't help repeating the sound he made, albeit softer. "D-dammit, you  _slut!"_  His free hand dug its nails into Kiri's back as he kept alternating between the gratifying licks, bites, and kisses. Bakugo was actually kinda starting to lose himself to the rhythm of that and Kirishima's hands molding his figure. His mouth explored all over his torso, and before he knew it, he had been flipped over to where his boyfriend would make sure to leave marks.  
  
"Fucking  _Eijirou_ , you goddamn whore," he drawled loosely but craned his neck for Kirishima nonetheless to get another bite in. He bit onto the sheets to keep himself from moaning and pulled back up.   
  
"I mean, you're the one who sounds like one," Kirishima pointed out and shoved his face into the bed playfully, but he had no idea how much that turned Bakugo on. He squeaked hearing the familiar crackle of his boyfriend's hands and yoinked his hand back in alarm. "D-Dude, it was a joke!"  
  
"Fuck you, I fucking  _hate_ you, fucking HELL," Bakugo groaned and pushed himself up on his sparking hands. "Dammit, dammit, _dammit..."_  
  
"W-What did I do?"  
  
"You're making me HORNY dammit! Fuck! YOU!" he snarled and shoved Eijirou. "I AM gay, see?! I told you! AAAGH! FUCK! You're so fucking hot Eijirou, it's not fair, it  _really_ isn't. Fuck." Kirishima was beet red and didn't get a word in before he was yanked up and kissed a little violently. "Dammit, FUCK, FUCKING HELL, FUCK!"  
  
"O-Okay, Bakugo, I think that's enough for toda--"  
  
"YOU GONNA BLUEBALL ME!?"  
  
"I-I mean, I  _could_ uh... get my hands in there..." When he started to reach ever so slightly, his hand was smacked away.  
  
"What!? The fuck do you think you're doing? You're not touching my  _dick_ , I'll jerk myself off! Stay here! Then we can play video games or whatever, fuckin'...." He snatched his shirt and wrestled it on menacingly for someone who had just been a total sub (albeit a lustful rage type) minutes ago. Kirishima was lost, as he usually was with his boyfriend. He watched him storm out the door and slam it shut.  
  
_He's pretty intense, but... I'd be lying if I said he wasn't cute,_  he thought to himself in the silence left behind. He collapsed back onto the bed and smiled.   _This was a nice session. Yeah. Very good session. I think he's got the hang of it. Oh man, I can't wait to do this more. I hope I didn't mark him up too bad. Good thing the weekend is ahead so he can cover up 'n stuff. I made sure not to leave too many in noticeable places._ His smile only grew wider.  _Wow, I... I wish we had been doing this from the start. He's so happy, too! I thought he'd be dominant, but he really isn't._  He scratched his side and stared at the ceiling. _I hope he's oka--_  
  
The door slammed back open, making Kiri jerk upright.  
  
"Kirishima, I can't jerk off," Bakugo snapped and had the most serious face Kiri had ever seen. "I tried doing it when I was younger, but when I get turned on my hands start crackling, and when I climax my they  _explode_ , so I nearly blew my dick off when it happened and I haven't done it since because I was afraid of turning my cock into a fuckin' fried chicken tender. I know there's other ways, but I don't feel like needing to buy a new fleshlight every time I feel a little spicy. A doll is too noticeable, and my mom hates it when I leave burn marks on my blankets and pilllows."  
  
_"Wow,"_  the redhead huffed, stuck between bewilderment, genuine understanding, and uncontrollable laughter. But given the cutthroat look on his boyfriend's face, laughing probably wasn't the best option.  _Explains why he's such a virgin, though._  "Well, um, do you want me to rub you up--?"  
  
"FUCKIN' NO, DIPSHIT! DON'T SAY IT LIKE THAT!"  
  
"Is... that a yes though?"  
  
"NO! J-Just give me a pillow..." A cushion hit him square in the face. "Thanks, birdshitter."   
  
\--  
  
It took a while, but Bakugo came back with a pile of ash. "There. You're welcome." He seemed heavily embarrassed and looked just about everywhere else, which Kiri understood. He probably understood a LOT more than Bakugo wanted him to, actually...  
  
As promised, they played cuddly video games together to cool the spicy mood down and just have all that quality time they had been missing. It was fun and while Bakugo nearly exploded the console, they still had a good time and exchanged actual loving looks to each other. It all ended too soon when the blonde had to leave, and they both seemed to refrain from kissing each other in front of Kiri's mom as they said their goodbyes. He later received a text from Bakugo saying "sorry about calling you a slut" and was instantly forgiven.  
  
But Kiri... earlier while Bakugo was off being busy, he had gotten a little busy himself. He had gone to use the bathroom but completely forgot his boyfriend was in there. And that's when he heard it. Those passionate words as he got frisky with the pillow. Or so he thought.  
  
"Kirishima, I... I love you. No, no that's not right...You can't tell him like that, you fucking blonde haired sack of shit. Yo, Eijirou! I love you! No! That's terrible! Um! Hey, um...e-eh... FUCK! I'm stuttering like that fucking cabbage haired--" He stopped abruptly, and for a moment, Kirishima thought he'd been found out. "...No... no, quiet down, me. Kirishima. I love you. When I get back in there, just... I'm gonna say it. Here I am talking to myself like a fucking idiot. I'm actually an idiot. Wow. Fuck me."   
  
Kirishima swiftly made his way back to his room, heart racing for all kinds of reasons.  
  
_Wow, that was really unfair of me. I stole away his 'I love you.' Not cool, Kiri._  But he was drowning in the very idea that Bakugo actually loved him, the fact that he was fighting himself in the mirror about it! He even faked needing to, well, please himself just so he could have a little pep talk to himself! Unless he was jerking off during the pep talk, which would be, uh, a little strange. Actually, all of Katsuki's behavior today was strange, but it was his second first time cuddling so he was sure they'd be able to sort it all out. He giggled stupidly recalling everything that happened today. Every time his name was moaned made him shiver with delight.  _He fucking loves me and he knows it. I can't wait for him to tell me...!  
  
_ But that day wasn't the day.  
  
Regardless, he sighed dreamily like a teenage girl and looked to the pile of ash Bakugo had given him after his alone time with himself. It was night, and that was all he had been thinking about after the blonde left.  _Maybe I should keep that in a jar. I mean, it might have his... burned baby juice in it, but still. A memento of the first time he said he loved me, even if it wasn't to my face, so it'll be funny when I tell him why I have it._  
  
So he put the charred pieces of pillow into a little glass jar labeled "I'm Waiting.  <3" He promised to himself when Bakugo finally said it, he'd open the jar to symbolize him letting his feelings out. But only when he was one hundred percent sure. A bold, passionate, face to face "I love you"-- nothing more, nothing less.   
  
Only then.


End file.
